♥My Melbourne Experience 2007-2009♥

2010-12-13T17:31:00.006+11:00

Ouh.... I am no longer writes here. I have moved to;

http://sinceandforever.blogspot.com

Bila Eena membebel: Sekian terima kasih!

Salam everyone...

2009-08-12T18:09:00.004+10:00

I dunno if there is anyone visiting this page... but for those who did, thanks a million. And sorry... for a long silence. I have arrived Malaysia safely and happily two weeks ago after completing my masters study at Melbourne, Australia. Meaning... no more stories from Melbourne *owhhh I miss Melbourne already.. especially the cold weather, hangat sungguh Msia skrg... sob sob*.

Ready to leave Melbourne... See, Puteh pun sedey nak cry cry.

Half-way between Melbourne and KL

"Welcome to Malaysia" - Thanks. Akhirnya sampai after 8hours flight. Adoyaii... saket tongkeng.. Opss!.

Safely kembali pada keluarga...

And ever since I have completed my study in Melbourne, this page is no longer relevant for me to update more about my daily life and experience. What I have decided... is to open a new page and name it something... about me in Msia. And later, when I fly again and continue my study *maybe Canada, maybe U.S*, I will open a new page entitle... My Canada/U.S. Experience lakkk.. Occay la kan?

For the time being, I dun have much time and access to go online. But in a day or two, I will open the new page I have said just now. My experience in Msia so far?? Biasa la cik Eena... keje nya, jalan2 habiskan duit jaaa. Makan and traveling. Will tell you guys more in my new page. But for now, I guess it is worth to say dat I am fine and in good health. And so my family... I'm glad dat I have time to take care of my dad and bro at home. In the mean time, I am also busy with Ph.D. application. Lotssaaa things in hands actually. And mayb more interesting, tis Melbourne graduate are going to turun padang n tolong kat pasar Ramadhann.... tu diaaa..! Jeng jeng jeng... just wait for the update k.

Till then... salam.

Bila Eena membebel: rindu nak bebel2... takpe takpe... nnt kan je la... hikss!~

Flying home...

2009-07-29T22:24:00.004+10:00

Passenger has confirmed.

Airline: Malaysia Airlines MH148

Aircraft: Boeing 777-200/200ER

Yup! I finally confirmed my flight ticket to be going home FOR GOOD. Alhamdulillah.

2 years just went flash. I experienced all the ups and downs along the journey to achieve my masters degree, away from home and in a such great varsity. And alhamdulillah, I finally make it.

I cant stop thanking everyone... for every single contribution to my success. Tho it is not as much big success compared to others who make such a great name in the academic world, I still owe everyone gratitude and thanks for being backbone to the completion of masters study. Wasnt easy but with all the supports and courages, I finally make it. If I wanna name everyone, it will be a very long list. But sincerely, I thanks everyone... yup, everyone! Family members, closed friends, relatives, colleagues, roomate(s), friends, enemies (if there's any), blogmates, or whoever you are. THANKS A MILLION.

One thing for sure... this is only the beginning. I have to start thinking of my Ph.D. project and looking for an exact varsity to do my doctoral study. Hopefully, with everyone's pray and supports, I will be accepted into the varsity I dream of all this while. InsyaAllah.

-----

Life is getting tougher. I may be a good student. I may be an excellent academician. I may be an inspiration among my colleagues. But life always been a great challenge. It's rarely get any easier. Sometimes, I dun really understand the way this world and the people around me works. I may not be a fully functional friend or in other words, not fully humane-function. I have to admit I am weak in the matter of love. I completed my masters degree with an excellent score in my thesis - studying about complex love relationship. But personally, I am very poor in experiencing love and personal feelings, myself. Some says I am too secretive *betol ke description nih?*. But yup, I still prefer to be single. I cannot handle love and intimate relationship at the moment. Or, maybe it is just not the right time yet. Or, maybe I havent met my Mr. Right yet. But 1 thing for sure, I am not selective person. Neither fuss in choosing my partner. it may not be accurate, but I kinda feel tired with love and serious relationship.

So, for those who keep asking me... Balik ni nak kawen ke? Sapa your bf? Nape takde bf? Tak rasa nak kawen ke? Tak takut takde org nak ngan u ke nnt? All I cud say... "insyaAllah, ada jodoh takkan ke mana. Semua tu keje Allah". For the time being, I just feel like wanna concentrate on my study.

Special note to those who concern; From deep inside my heart, I am truly sorry... I may not be a great lover. And sorry... for not being the best and for making you upset. I am just an ordinary person, sometimes makes mistakes and I cannot satisfy everyone with my doings.

Aku yang lemah tanpamu
Aku yang rentan karena
Cinta yang tlah hilang darimu
Yang mampu menyanjungku

Selama mata terbuka
Sampai jantung tak berdetak
Selama itu pun
Aku mampu tuk mengenangmu

Darimu...
Kutemukan hidupku
Bagiku...
Kau lah cinta sejati

Ooh...

Bila yang tertulis untukku
Adalah yang terbaik untukmu
Kan kujadikan kau kenangan
Yang terindah dalam hidupku
Namun takkan mudah bagiku
Meninggalkan jejak hidupku
Yang tlah terukir abadi
Sebagai kenangan yang terindah

Ooh...

Dihimpit dicengkam rindu ini
Gerimis duka ku
Menggamit kenangan silam
Resah dan pilu menghampiri

Sunyinya malamku kelam
Pedih kemelut cinta
Dingin kelu bicara
Tuk mengungkap rindu

Sayang ku mungkir pada kejujuranmu
Menolak segala bahgia dihadapanku
Kasihku mungkir pada kata janjiku
Berlari aku jauh dari cintamu
Ku kesali

Dihanyut dilambung ombak lara
Sepiku berkelana
Melayari jiwa nestapa
Menggagahi rasa kesayuan

Leburlah harapan cinta
Namun kesetiaanmu
Kugenggam bagai hukuman
Mengheret langkahku

Maafkan daku
Kekasih hati cinta kita berakhir
Maafkan daku
Kerna ku memungkirinya

Maafkan daku
Kekasih hati cinta jadi begini
Maafkan daku
Ku mungkir bahagia

For now... I choose my study.
For now... I can only sorry for not being able to love.
For now... I can only admit how much you hates me.

But I also hope,
1 day you will forgive me.
1 day you will understand the reason I'm doing this.
1 day you will know I am not as bad as you think I am.

and..

I am really sorry.

-----
Tomorrow, at about this time... I'll be home already. No more Melbourne cold. No more accessible trams to get to the city. And perhaps, no more speedy internet connection. I just hope, I cud figure out something so that I can go online from home. I really need to figure it out coz I depend so much on internet to deal with lotssaa things, including my Ph.D. application.

Till then, I wont be able to update this blog, or online. It may takes sometime... and how long it's gonna be, I have no idea.

-----
Goodbye Melbourne... Goodbye everyone. Gonna miss lottssaa things about Melbourne.

Bila Eena membebel: Huhu, tetiba rasa len macam lak...

Settled with Univ. of Melb

2009-07-28T08:05:00.004+10:00

I finally got good response from the faculty's admin office yesterday evening. So now, I'm just waiting for USM to issue my flight ticket. I am surely they will do something soon as I have bombarded her email (Pn. Nina, USM HR office) with tonnes of urgent notes inquiring for flight tix. Nasib laa, sapa suh macam2 kan. Hiksss. As all the admin thingy cleared, I finally see my name in the graduation list.

confirm sudah Cik Eena ngan awards masters degree in Criminology yg byk org tak tahu apa kejadah punya course kan. hikssss~

Ha, I knw some of you feels tertipu ngan my pic in the gown. Then cmana baru dapat call for graduation ceremony lak kan? Haaa, let me tell ya ONCE AGAIN... I was purposely hiring the gown for photoshoot session coz I cannot stay any longer and wait for the graduation ceremony. My dad is not very well and I believe he needs me more. And ofcoz I dun mind at all coz I already have hundreds of pics in the gown. Gila la cik Eena kalau berposing kan. Puas ati!

-----

I finally manage to organize my luggage to fix into the limited weight of 23kgs. Dang, it is the only thing I dun like people to see coz it is damn huge and people keep saying... hayooohhh tak lebey limit ke berat beg itu??? Agagaga... I knw. But occayla, I managed to keep it under 23 kgs. But I'm a bit worry about my handcarry luggage. It is supposed to be not more than 7kgs, but... tau aje lar, bila dah boh Corelle, dah boh Pyrex... adoyai, ended-up jadi 10kgs. For now, finger-crossed je lerrr...and ready with $$$ kalau terkena dek pegawai yang fussy. Seriously reminds me of the time when I first came here. The same huge beg with a backpack. But balik, huge luggage, and handcarry luggage, and backpack, and handbag full with things. This is not including my 50kgs stuffs yang dihntr via Jetta cargo tu. Adoyaii... Ni mujur 2 tahun je... If 3 years? 4 years? 6 years? Bankrupt! Agagaggaaa...

When I first came here... I was all alone. I had no idea about Melbourne *ada la study sikit2 pasal Melbourne but not in detail la*. I still remember, I arrived in the morning at Tulamarine International Airport. The arrival hall was abit quiet at the time. Maybe it was very early in the morning. All I cud remember... I was abit blur. Sebab baru bangun tido pun ye gak. Yelah kan 8 hours journey. But more bcoz of... I dunno how to react to the fact that I was not dreaming... and already landed in Melbourne. First time being away *real away* from family for a long time. Dulu gi Jepun pun cuma 2 minggu lebey gitu je. Waiting for the Uni rep to pick me up and send me to Malaysian Hall - stayed there for nearly 2 weeks. And I cud still remember how regret I am coz there was no one I cud ask to take my pic at the airport... Haiyoh. Eena... Eena... dah la sejuk2, berasap bila breathe, jakun sikitla time tu. Ofcoz la wanna take pics kan. And nasib baek I didnt have to wait too long for the Uni rep to pick me up... yelah, dah la sorang2... ntah sapa2 je leh culik aku. Erkkk, ada ke org nak culik makhluk bersaiz besar ni? Hiksss.

It's going to be a veryyyy long story if I wanna tell the whole lot of experience when I first stepped down Melbourne. Blum kesah pacik driver (Uni rep) yang rosakkan tayar luggage aku tu.. blum kesah experience aku duk kat Hall yang buatkan aku tanak dah duk sana.. haa, blum kesah hantu kat hall lagi. Mcm2 laaa... All I can say... it's going to be something that I wont ever forget and I am very thankful to Allah for giving such a precious opportunity to me... I finally achieved my dream to study abroad. Alhamdulillah.

And now... it's the time to leave Melbourne *yer, tunggu flight jemput je nihhh*. Tears? Nop! Who knws, I'll be here again... visiting my sister pulak. My sis dapat scholar JPA utk study kat Australia gaksss.

Bila Eena membebel: 2 years... kejap je rasa! tak sempat cari boyfren pon... hahaha!

Still in Melbennnn

2009-07-27T15:58:00.006+10:00

Yuupppsss! I am still in Melbourne... and haven't confirm my flight tix YET! Mum calls me nearly EVERYDAY asking when exactly I'll be flying home and I started to get annoyed *not with my mom* with the admin complex thingy which kept me hold here in Melbourne. Sabo ye Mae.... nnt along balik arrr. Well... not dat I dun like staying here in Melbourne.. but for a poor student like me *poor laa sbb elaun dah tak masuk, kan....* and to stay here, is equal to spending lottssaaaaa moneyysss *see, plural tu*.

After Nazrul, Mazlee already home safely... arrived at Msia last nite.

malee ngan muka seposen, tahan airmata sedey. peserta tersingkir pada minggu ini... hehehe.

pasnih, takde la pic camni lagi ye Lee. Nanti tunang u jeles lakss.. tak pasall!

Leaving me and Akmal, waiting for our turn to be going home. I'm expecting that I'll be flying home before Akmal *owh God, pleaseeee make it soon!*.

2 org budak yg sedang tunggu turn naek kapal terbang... tunggu masa untuk tersingkir.. hiks!

I have emailed USM, called Nina (USM)... climb up and down the SSPS at UniMelb and faculty office. Emailed Nat and Lindsay... and the outcome, turn to be very regretful. Yang pasti, I wont be flying tomorrow. Shoot! Jangan... nanti aku makin malas nak balik, baru tahuuuuu!!~ Sapa nak bertanggungjawab??

Just like Akmal, people start to ask me, when are you leaving for good. Adoyaii... kalau la leh buka talian hayat kan besh. Hikss... Patience everybody. I'll let u guys knw when the time comes ait! But actually, I really wanna fly when everyone is busy and have no time to send me off to Tullamarine Airport. Malas laaa blues2 lak karang. Ahaksss... Dats y I urge USM and UniMelb to settle my things off asap so I can fly during the weekdays. Jessnor dah bagi warning hangat... "berani la nak fly diam2... mmg nak kena cepuk la tu!" adoyai! Takleh ke gitu? Yups, I really dun wan anyone to send me to the airport. Malas betol laaa... hiks!

Bila Eena membebel: Aku dah mula nak tanya kerja kosong kat Airport nihhh... haaa, jangan! tup tup aku jadi stewardess tak pasalll. agagagaga... ada hati!

Completing the course.. pics in gown

2009-07-24T11:44:00.003+10:00

Few days ago, I hired graduation gown for photo shoot sessions around the uni. Biasala cik Eena kalau berposing... mgm sakan. Ngalahkan org shoot utk pic kawen. Hundred over pics! Dang!!! Tu dia.. Seriously I didnt knw it was dat much.. coz Akmal yg snap. I just stand and pose as he asked. Again, I'd like to thank K. Etty for sponsoring me the gown, and to Akmal and Mazlee for spending the time with me.

Here are some of the pics... Yup, I have completed the course and finally be awarded with M.Criminology, from the University of Melbourne. It is just the beginning anyway... Doa2kan la proses utk mendapatkan tempat buat Ph.D. semuanya berjalan lancar... Apa2 pun, kite raya di Msia dulu this year.... Hip Hip... Hooorayyyyy!!! Alhamdulillah..

Bila Eena membebel: Skrg ngah duk sakit kepala ngurus nak balik lak... tak suka la pindah2 ni. penat.. takleh ke pejam mata je, tup tup barang semua dah sampai kat rumah kat Msia? Hiksss...

Jom nyanyi sama...

2009-07-23T18:28:00.004+10:00

Perjalanan jauh tak ku rasa
(owhhh rasa gak kut... saket montot 8 jam dalam flight.. sungguh tak suka)
Kerna hati ku melonjak sama
Ingin berjumpa sanak saudara
Yang selalu bermain di mata

Nun menghijau gunung ladang dan rimba
(uish, cam duk utan lak... lagi pun naek flight, tak nampak kut...hiks)
Langit nan tinggi bertambah birunya
Deru angin turut sama berlagu
Semuanya bagaikan turut gembira
(ada ke org gembira aku nak balik ni???)

Balik kampung oh oh
Balik kampung oh oh
Balik kampung oh oh
Hati girang
Ho ho... Balik kampung
Ho ho... Balik kampung
Ho ho... Balik kampung
Hati girang

Terbayang wajah-wajah yang ku sayang
Satu-satu tersemat di kalbu
Pasti terubat rindu di hati
Menyambut kepulangan ku nanti

Bila Eena membebel: Excited kah nak balik? Sedihkah mo tinggal melben... hurmhhh...

Busy, busy...

2009-07-23T17:58:00.002+10:00

Busy mengalahkan orang nak kawen. Opssss, takde kaitan.

Yup, been very busy lately. Lotssaa things to be done before leaving Melbourne. Plus, my internet connection at home have been terminated... yelah, watpe nak byr lagi kalau dah nak balik kan. So, I have to go online in the uni to check my emails and stuffs. Hah, talking about going online in the uni... few days ago when I went online in the uni. Nazrul buzz me and asked me kat mana. Ofcoz I was saying that I'm in the uni. The funny part was... when Nazrul surprisingly kinda shout "woit sis, tak cukup lagi ke bertapa kat uni. bukan dah habis ka? suka sangat ke duk library tu?". LOL. Adoyai... Nak buat cmana kan. My internet connection has been terminated.

Lottssaaa TTDs in hand; to pack my thingsssss (sooo plural occay coz I have lottssaaa stuffs) and prepare it for Jetta Express (cargo to Msia), also to pack and distribute stuffs I'm not going to bring home (tolong rumet pindah, takkan nak tinggal longgok je barang kan, sian lak dia); to meet lecturers to get recommendation letters (owh kena sedut byk2 recommendation letters ni, baru senang nak apply Ph.D. nnt) and to say gudbye; to settle admin things (kena inform admin office contact details kat Msia, dapatkan transcript, letters of completion, bla bla bla); and many more.

Nazrul already home almost 2 weeks. Mazlee will be elaving this Sunday. Akmal tu ntah bila *sila tanya dia sendiri occay*. And... I am waiting for my flight ticket. I have informed USM that I wanna be home by August 3rd, the latest. Few days ago, I called Nina (USM, HR office) and asked her to book ticket on the July 28th. And still waiting for her response... Adoyai, mmg gini ler kalau melibatkan admin staff. It will take some time... Mom pulak nearly everyday, pagi petang call tanya "Dah kol USM ke... dah confirm tiket ke... durian nak habis musim dah nii". See, ayat terakhir tu yg tak tahan tu... sempat gik iklan tu.... adoyai! Tak kurang jugak yang cakap; "how do you feel about coming home, sihat tak tu? jangan balik bawak H1N1 laksss.' Adoyai... FYI, people in Melbourne doesnt care as much as people in Msia. And we, people in Melbourne dun feel much threatened by the virus, at least not as anxious as people in Msia. To be honest, aku lebey takut dengan org Msia yang over2 tkt ngan virus H1N1. Seriously, H1N1 in Melbourne is not as bad as what people takutkan sangat2 tu...

Yesterday, I had a photoshoot session with my graduation gown. Many thanks to K. Etty for sponsoring me the gown. Thanks also to Akmal (as the photgrapher) and Mazlee (as apa Lee... I tak hengat lak jawatan yang u sebut smalam tu... hiks). I forgot to bring the pictures to upload onto here... but will definitely put some tonite or tomorrow.

Occayla. I have to write-off now. Will write again later. For now... daaaaaa. Salam

Bila Eena membebel: Dah dua hari ujan kat Melbourne... sedih aku nak balik Msia ke... hiks!~ Sejuknyaaaaa Melbourne!

Final...

2009-07-20T09:20:00.003+10:00

Alhamdulillah. this morning when I opened my email, there was an email from Nat (our pgrad admin staff). My eyes were automatically fresh and all woke up to see dat. Straight sit in front lappy and read the email. Owh THANK GOD! I finally received my thesis result... and it was an excellent score. Feels like all my hard works; bermalam kat library, sacrifice my leisure time, for all the ups and downs, and the whole lot - are all worth now. Sangat bersyukur!

Million thanks for everyone... i really mean it. Every one! Those who I already knw before I'm here, those who I've met and knw here, and who have supported me eventho without meeting me. MANY THANKS for your courage and supports. Allah je dapat balas semuanya... Of course, my gratitude also goes to my respected supervisor, Juliet Rogers, teachers and family.

I have emailed USM to get flight tickets. Hopefully, I will get it soon. Then I can go home... proudly after completing my masters study. Am looking forward to my Ph.D. application. Will be another challenge... but with my thesis result, I am all confident dat I cud proceed with my dream to get a place in a good, prestigious university - as Uni. of Melbourne, insyaAllah. Please pray for my success. Owh... I'm sooo looking forward to it.

----------

Everything feels good this morning. Hopefully this will last till the night. Or, the better... forever. My study has been nearly everything to me. Other than my beloved family. This is perhaps obvious for those who close to me. I cud still remember... my rumet was once said, "Eena ni kalau tanya apa dia mimpi... sure buku punya." Adoyai... sampai camtu ke ek? lol. Tak kesah lar, but today... I feel like I have conquered the world. I finally forgot my envious feeling I have for friends who have scored straight HDs in their master's study. I finally dun care with the feeling I used to have with those who cud turn their masters project to a Ph.D. study. All I knw, I have completed my study excellently and be part of Univ. of Melbourne graduates. I knw, it is just the beginning... but to me, it is a great beginning to my big dream. Amin!

Do it, now
You know who you are
You feel it in your heart
And you're burning with ambition

But first, wait
Won't get it on a plate
You gonna have to work for it
Harder and harder

And I know
Cause I've been there before
Knocking on the doors
With rejection (rejection)
And you'll see
Cause if it's meant to be
Nothing can compare
To deserving your dreams

It's amazing
It's amazing
All that you can do
It's amazing
Makes my heart sing
Now it's up to you

Patience, now
Frustration is in the air
And people who don't care
Well it's gonna get you down

And you'll fall
Cause you will hit a wall
But get back on your feet
And you'll be stronger
And smarter

And I know
Cause I've been there before
Knocking down the doors
Won't take no for an answer

And you'll see
Cause if it's meant to be
Nothing can compare
To deserving your dreams

Don't be embarrassed, don't be afraid, don't let your dreams slip away.
Don't be scared of using your gift -- everybody has a gift.
Never give up, never let it die,
Trust your instincts, and most importantly...
You've got nothing to lose, so just go for it!

----------

2 years time just went flash. Am now in the final phase... I have terminated my VirginMobile number. And today will be the last day for my internet connection. Then I might be busy arranging my stuffs for cargo. Admin things with the uni. And... spend every moments in Melbourne before leaving home for real GOOD. ('';)

Planning for photo shoot in graduation gown. Maybe tomorrow or the day after. Yup, I cudnt stay for my convocation coz my dad is ill. So, I'm going to hire the gown, instead.. and take photos around with friends.

----------

Was thinking of just resting at home today. But... I think it is such a nice day and I shud go out, at least to get some fresh air. Yup, I shud! Better get myself up... and ready. ('';)

Bila Eena membebel: Keep singing "It's Amazing".. coz I feel amazing today.

Traveling around: more stories - Melbourne Gaol, Botanic Garden and Shrine of Remembrance

2009-07-16T19:03:00.003+10:00

Date: 8 July 2009

Old Melbourne Gaol

Owh, I havent finish reporting my holiday experience. The next day after back from Mt. Buller, I finally visiting Old Melbourne Gaol. A place I wanted to visit for so long. Funny. Why? Coz it is simply located within walking distance from my apartment and I kept thinking of... when I shud visit the place. As I'm studying crime thingy, visiting this kind of place is considered as a must. It was an interesting place, tho there were no real prisoner or stuffs like dat. Before I went into the gaol, I thot there was nothing much than looking at the structure of the prison. But they have made it interesting but putting interesting cases and histories into nearly each of the cells, pulling the people to read each of the stories. We began with self-guided tour in the gaol. The construction of the inner part of the building is interesting and scarily looked. I managed to take lotssaa pictures inside there. Fascinating!

Then, they have tis activity called "watch house experience" in every 30 minutes if I'm not mistaken. tak hengat la pulakkk, hiks. Tis is an opportunity for the visitor to experience being a prisoner - lined-up as prisoner, being checked-up for details, locked-up in cell, experience how it is in the large-shared bathroom/toilet, and stuffs like dat. Besh besh... Tapi gelak2 je byk. Siap amek2 photo lagi ada la. Hehe. Then, there's another guided tour into the old magistrate court, the next door to where watch house experience located.

Botanic Garden and Shrine of Remembrance

After having lunch in the city, we jump onto a free tourist shuttle bus and spend hours traveling around the city and dropped off at the last station, Royal Botanic Garden and Shrine of Remembrance. For those who love green and looking for something close to the nature, this place is a must go place. I've been there many times already and still haven't finish walk around the garden and still loving to take pictures there. Besh!

Bila Eena membebel: Boleh wat diari dah ni... byk betul citer berjalan. Tapi jalan dekat2 je.

Risk and Wants

2009-07-16T15:42:00.003+10:00

I happen to read this news while I was checking my email just now; a story of the oldest woman to give birth who dies yesterday at the age of 69-yo. This story reminds me of my experience living in Kota Bharu, Kelantan few years ago. I did my first degree at USM, Kubang Kerian Kelantan and spend most of my time in the campus which happen to be in the hospital (HUSM) environment. I hope my words won't harm or offend anyone. Tis is just my opinion thru my true observation for nearly 4 years living in Kota Bharu, Kelantan.

I come from a big family, with 8 siblings. I knw the struggle to raise lotssaaa kids. I dun have problems with those who say they like having lotssa children (especially Malays la ni) coz people say, banyak anak ni, murah rezeki (I cannot locate the origin of this words; is it from the perspective of budaya Melayu? or is it something said by the religion?). Again, I'd like to emphasize dat I am not against the idea of having lotssaaa children. Coz I am personally enjoy having a big family. Kecik2 mmg la bergaduh je... dah besar ni, meriah lak rasa. But I have problem with those who are already aged and still wanna go with pregnancy, attempt to having child eventho it is obviously risky, not only to the mother but also to the baby. There are many complications related to the moms who have decided to pregnant at the age of 40+ (blum lagi masuk kes2 yg masih nak pregnant pas usia 50++; boleh baca artikel ni : CLICK). Sometimes, it's not the woman's the decision... Multi-factoral - husband who are against family planning; some says it is against the religion to control pregnancy (dalam Grey's Anatomy pun ada tunjuk citer camnihhh, katanya it is sinful); and many more.

Living in Kota Bharu gave me perspective into this issue. Not only that having lotssa children is kinda normal in Kelantan. But I find something merely unique to the people there. I ever saw a couple; the wife was pregnant and they both holding their kids, 5 of them - I estimate their age to be around 1-yo to 6-yo. All DOWN SYNDROME. I cud refer the wife as old as a grandmom and so the husband. And I believe, dats why they are having down syndrome kids. And it is also quite normal to see old women pregnant in Kelantan. Susah2 naik bas mini ulang alik ke hospital for medical checkups... Then, it is also common to see poor family (no offend occay, but when I say poor, it really means POOR; rumah pecah2, atap bocor, anak2 tak sekolah, makan pun ala kadar), who already have a number of kids (ada tu, dah ada 5,6 orang anak) and still go with pregnancy *biasanya org camni... positively say, takpe... setiap anak, ada rezekinya*. Adoyai...

How do I feel about it? Mixed-feelings. Kesian mmg kesian. But marah pun ada. Dun they even think about the health-risk? what about the future of the kids? Say if you're pregnant at the age of 45+... how long do you think you cud look after your baby? The pregnancy itself is very risky... it is fine if you're having a healthy baby and you are lucky to be alive till 60+ (considering a woman pregnant at the age of 40s and the baby grows to at least 18 years). But what happen to those who deliver down syndrome babies, or mentally challenged kids.. and the moms suffer lottssaa health problems following the pregnancy? Who're going to raise the kids? And for those who are already poor, and still go on with pregnancy... aduss, mmg payah la nak cakap lagi. If you are not pity to yourselves, dun you even think about the future of the kids? How are going to feed them? Susu lampin skrg bukan murah woiiiii... Blum kira kos nak hantar gi skolah lagi.. bla bla bla. And who are going to answer questions like... who going to educate the kids? belum lagi issues like masalah remaja... and bla bla bla. What I'm trying to say is... this is not only on-the-dot problems, but it may have a long-term effects; to the immediate family, and to the society as a whole.

I'm studying Criminology and Sociology... and I have to admit the fact that this is one of the contributing factors to the societal problems. The fact is very simple; over-population and over-crowded environment are often correlated to many problems. Foods, disease, jobs, economics, and many more. Yes, Malaysia govt. aims to achieve millions of population, but I'd rather suggest they change the slogan to achieving a million of productive and healthy population; including the matter related to well-being. There is no point to have millions of population where in the meantime, most percentages of the population ended up in prison or drug-treatment facilities.

Totally emotional huh... but this is the truth. Something for everyone to ponder.

Occayla... bebel panjang dah ni. Tak pasal2 emo bila baca artikel tersebut. Dah la tipu umur masa nak wat in vitro... dapat twins, meninggal waktu umur diorang baru 2 thn lak tu. Apa la nasib budak2 tu... Haih manusia!~

Bila Eena membebel: Sometimes, kite cakap tak guna akal. Buat benda tak pk akibat. Yang tanggung akibat... siapa? Mereka dan keluarga mereka... Pandainyerrr!!!

Traveling around: Snow, tobogganing and skiing at Mt. Buller

2009-07-16T06:16:00.004+10:00

I dun care what people wud say. People are always see and talk about bad-side of the story. It seemed to be one of the nature. Yeah, and we are always troublesome in the search for the answer... why people cannot appreciate 1000 goods rather than 1 mistake or the bad? It is very funny when people never see my hardworking and survival for being 2 years away from my beloved family. I've been quarantined myself for nearly 3 months and when I'm showing myself to the world, some says.. "Wuoh, you seemed to have/wasting lotssaa money traveling around." Ehem, ehem.. testing 1,2,3... DO I CARE for what u're saying? *walaupun dalam hati ada sikit sakit ati* I think I deserved all this. Or, mayb I shud remind you what I have been thru tis couple of months... *kalau nak citer perit-jerih selama 2 thn study nanges la pulak karang. Kata show off pulak karang. Manusia...*. I had to work every seconds... set my mind dat tis is only temporary, upon completing my master study. So I didnt mind to sacrifice my sleep time... while others are dreaming, and yawning wake up late, I was still in the library... finishing my academia stuffs. I have to spend every pennies and took out my savings to ensure I have submitted the best of mine. And now, while I am waiting for my full result and official graduation offer, I just try to spend a very limited time and chances I have to travel to places I shud be visiting in 2 YEARS! And you can simply say... I'm wasting my money... I'm doing unwise decision... bla bla bla. But again, DO I CARE? Yes, I do. But I wont regret! I knw I deserved all these! For some people, traveling is as simple as saying. Once they wish to go some places, they can make it anytime. Just swipe watever 'magical' card and... the next day, they can already proudly reporting that they have been here and there. But for me... money is always a constrain. I have to save by my own to travel around. So, dun mess with me.

I'll be leaving Melbourne as soon as I receive my official graduation offer and for now.. I just wanna spend as much time as possible to really enjoy my life here.

Thanks Allah, for giving me this opportunity and I obey to all the difficulties and hard-times I've been thru... coz I believe there's always a reason behind it.

Date: 7 July 2009

Dat was the time I've been waiting for. To enjoy the snow before leaving the country. Yeah, coz we dun have winter and snow back in Malaysia. However, it was not my first time 'climbing up' to Mt. Buller. I have been there last year... and I have written about my unfortunate no-snow experience (check this entry to read: Mt. Buller 2008). But luckily this year, snow is thick. Lotssaaa people enjoy skiing (mostly) and tobogganing. Unlike last year, tis year I prefer to go with a tour group, to spend a day just to play till exhausted and be home by the night. Cost saving and enuff playing time. It cost me 50% of a total adult fees (89dollars) when I join Tuesday trip with Alzburg tour. Waiting at the Federation Sq as early as 4:30 in the morning and reaching the destination early in the morning. At first, I was only thinking of tobogganing. But... it was pretty obvious dat most of the people (even the kids) go to Mt. Buller for SKIING rather than tobogganing!!! I feel abit awkward playing toboggan where most of the time, I was surrounded by kids and not much of teens or adults *kalau ada pon, sbb teman anak diorang maen toboggan tu, adusss*. So, for the sake of... ntah, maybe just wanna try *yelah, once in a lifetime*, I hired skiing apparatus *ingat apa... nak keje kat lab ke pakai apparatus segala?.. no, no, no... ni duit woooo nak menyewa*. Luckily we manage to get a good price to hire those stuffs for like what... only 2 hours? Kompius tokey tu.. bila kitorang nak pulangkan semua mendalah skiing tu... dia kata, "awat kejap sangat?" Pandai kan dia ckp melayu? tipu je tu... translation. hiksss!

Tu dia... Toboggan, Skis, Ski Boots, and Poles.

But overall... I really enjoyed my trip this time. Jimat pun jimat. Senang pun senang. Takyah byk2 politik nak tunggu semua org buat decision nak gi ke idak. Aku bawak badan aku sudah... hiks.

Bila Eena membebel: Hidup ni kalau nak ikut je apa org kata... mmg tak ke mana la. buat kecut hati je. Yelah, sbb asek berkecik ati. Eheheheh.

Traveling around: Ballarat, Victoria

2009-07-15T07:52:00.004+10:00

Date: 6 July 2009

The very next day... I went to Ballarat. Senang cakap, tempat tu mmg mcm pekan cowboy. Very historical with lotssaaa old buldings and its main gold-mining history. It took about 1 hour++ via VLine train from Southern Cross station to get there. Very interesting journey I'd say - especially it was my first time traveling with VLine.

We took lotsssaaaaa pics, of course - dah mmg hobi kan, hiksss. However as usual, I wish I cud spend more time there - tak sempat pun travel around the actual Ballarat city and surrounding areas. Spent most of the time at Sovereign Hills and Gold Museum. But overall, mmg besh larrr!

Back to the city in the evening... and resting. Ready for the next day trip to Mt. Buller - maen snowwwwww! Hiks!~

Bila Eena membebel: Citer bersambung lagikkkk!!!

Traveling around: VicMart, Cooks Cottage - Fitzroy Garden, St. Kilda

2009-07-15T07:11:00.005+10:00

Date: 5 July 2009

Started the trip for the day by going to Victoria Market, last minute shopping before snow trip to Mt. Buller; snow gloves, beanie, and stuffs. After spend some time at VicMart, we had lunch at EsTeller @Cardigan St. and ready to go to Fitzroy Garden, one of the Melbourne's attractions.

I was seriously surprised when looking at the entrance fee into the Cooks Cottage, Fitzroy Garden - when I flipped thru the Melbourne's guideline. It is seriously cheap, AUD2++. But when we got there... and realize the place only covers a very tiny house and mini garden around the house. Dats it! No wonder larrr! But it is a historical one - believed to be owned by Captain Cook. After exploring into the house and took pictures around, we just walked around Fitzroy Garden - naseb baek la cuaca ok and cun utk bergambar2.

In the evening, we went to St. Kilda beach (after sunset)... and we were thinking of going to Luna Park - which happen to be 5 minutes by walking from the beach. But unfortunately, it was already about to close when we reached there. Tak tau ler pulakkk during winter, opening hours dia during the day. Maybe bcoz of the cold, so they open during the day thruout winter season. But nvm. Our activity still on - apalagi... amek2 pics lar. Hiksss!

After dat, we had coffee at nearby McDonalds while thinking of other plan instead of straight home. Ye ar, dah tak jadi masuk Luna Park kan. Ngan perut mula berkeroncong lagik... And, alhamdulillah, Mazlee and Akmal were kindly offer us to chill out @Malaysia Hall - Akmal blanja pizza for dinner. Thanks mate! Lepak there till nite and home... resting.

Bila Eena membebel: Byk jalan2 je... walau tak kemana sgt pon, tp mmg tak melekat kat rumah lerr... duk umah tak buat apa, bakal mengundang pemikiran bukan2... so better kuar, buat busy je. lagipun, bila lagi... dah nak balik msia dah pon!

Traveling around: Back to Melbourne!

2009-07-15T06:49:00.004+10:00

Date: 4 July 2009

After a couple of days at Gold Coast, we're back in Melbourne. I have planned to go to the main attractions in Melbourne (and of course those I really am interested to go to).

After landed in Melbourne with Tiger Airways, we went directly to Global Village for a farewell lunch - it was tentatively planned by five of us, who are finishing our studies tis semester; me, Nazrul, Akmal, Mazlee and Aliyah. But it was more on celebrating and saying goodbye to Nazrul who's leaving Melbourne the very next day. Since it was planned at the very last minute; after I have booked tickets to Gold Coast, so I just joined in terms of sharing the cost for the lunch and be part of the party *tak dapat nak tunjuk skill masak aku ler.. sori gang*. Occayla! Lauk menarek and pebret... Ayam masak merah, gulai daging masak lemak cili api *mmg pebret la*, and... ada pulak very belated burfday cake for me and kak Jess. Adusss... rasa mcm tak habis2 celebrate my burfday. Hiksss!~ *mcm saje nak igtkan aku ni dah tua ekkk, agagaggaa. takde takde, aku masih muda remaja... kata lahir tahun 1992. hiksss*

After spend the whole afternoon at Global Village, as I have planned earlier, we went for a movie in the evening, after Maghrib prayer - apalagi... Transformer yang mereka-mereka kata besh tu lar. I went just for the sake of Kak Jess and tetamu kite, yg begitu minat ngan Transformer itu... Jgn tak tau, I slept for the first 20 minutes, coz I cannot understand a thing about all those robots. Only woke up when I saw people *I mean real people, agagagaggaa*. Dahsyattttt tak? lol. Tu ar, told you already... I'm not into dat kind of story! Dun blame me for sleeping occay.

Bila Eena membebel: SAmbung lagi citer nnt k.....

Traveling around: Trip to Gold Coast

2009-07-14T09:12:00.009+10:00

GOLD COAST
Date: 2 to 4 July, 2009

Lotssaaa pictures and stories if I wanna report in here. All I cud say... I really enjoy my trip to Gold Coast. I know, 3 days 2 nights were tooo short to explore the whole places. But at least, I have been there. Dats the most important thing I guess. I never thot I cud have the chance to go to Gold Coast *some even positively says, maybe bukan rezeki aku nak sampai sana lagi*. Mahal! Dats what most of the people wud say. Except for those who really have $$$$ lar kan. Ofcoz ofcoz not a prob. But alhamdulillah, sampai gakkkk. I take it as a reward for myself... upon the completion of my study. So, not a big deal anyway. Beshhhh woooo GOld Coast!

Spent nights at International Backpackers Hotel. But most of the time, we spent our time outdoors - especially at the Movie World.

Layan je lar pictures yg ada... wont enuff spaces if I wanna upload all onto tis page ('';)

And yeah... ada vid Live! Hollywood Stunt (Cars and Bike) ... Layannn~

Bila Eena membebel: Ada rezeki, next time ke Disneyland and Hollwood, LA lak kan... Aminnn!~

Hello everyone!~ Am back...

2009-07-14T08:03:00.004+10:00

Salam and greeting everyone~

it's been long.. long.. while I didn't update this poor blog huh~ Sorry guys. I've been very busy spend my time with friends after finishing all assessments for the semester *and for my masters study, of course*. Lotssaaa to tell but in the meantime, I wanna spend as much time as possible traveling around, explore places I really wanna go before am leaving home for good.

Alhamdulillah, I have passed all the subjects. Shelly, one of my criminology's colleagues eagerly told everyone dat we cud check our result the night before the result announcement date. So... everyone *including me, ofcoz ofcoz ofcoz, lol* was excitedly checking the result as we wanted to confirm whether or not we passed all the subjects before leaving the country. Happy to hear dat everyone passed the subjects *sudah semestinya... kami kan pelajar berdedikasi... agagaga!~ poyos jaaa*. And only me, waiting for the thesis result, coz am the only one amongst my closed crim colleagues who doing the thesis component... Am expecting the result will come up anytime by the 15th. After dat, I just have to wait for the official graduation offer *graduation certificate, name list for conferring ceremony, bla bla bla*. Then only I can confidently say dat.. Yesssss, I have been awarded with an M. Crim degree *still people ask, what the heck is M.Crim... M.Crim stands for Master in Criminology.. sekian, terima kasih*.

Benni's already left Melbourne. When I asked him why he leave soooo early, he simply says dat, "I'm bored and dunno wat to do in Melbourne." Haiyooohhh Benni. Shame you. I knw the main reason u're leaving early is bcoz u miss your family sooooo much. It's normal for a family man, plus he used to be working instead of studying and being away from beloved ones. Watever it is, I wish you the best, Benni!

Similar with Nazrul... Among 5 of us *me, Mazlee, Akmal, and Aliyah*, he had to leave Melbourne early coz he has to report back to his office. Slamatttt Bro! But occayla... Nazrul has completed traveling around Australia. Just name it... Tassy? SA? Perth? Gold Coast? Sydney? Habissss dah semua tempat dia explore. Plus, he's about to go to Vietnam in a couple of weeks. How I wish to be as lucky as him. Murah betul rezeki dia... Bro... we'll meet in KL occay! Ready angpow raya k!

Wuoh.. after two years in Melbourne, insyaAllah I'll celebrate Ramadhan and Eid with my beloved family members this year. No more salam perantau la ye tis year... hahahaha.

Deja vu betol!~ Raya 2 kali je kat Melbourne, tapi masuk paper sampai 4 kali. Hiks!~ Gilo, gilo Tak perlu la tunjuk semua kut. ada yang loya tekak lak karang. hiks!~

Hoho, I better enjoy Eid with family coz I dunno whether or not I have the opportunity to celebrate Ramadhan and Eid with family next year. I'm imagining dat I'll be somewhere somewhere next years, just started my PhD. study pulakkk. So... apa lagi... But the funny part is... my mom awal2 lagi dah ckp, "hah, tahun nihhh mae nak jadi m'am je. Biar anak dara yg ready semua utk raya. adik2 semua tunggu along...". And I was joking to mom, "Alaaa, igtkan balik ni nak holiday... kena gak ke..? adoyaii!" hahahaha.. teruk ke?

Wuoh... despite my excitement to complete my study and going home, I'm soo gonna miss Melbourne. Lotsssaaa things I'm going to miss. Such a precious memory I have in Melbourne. And sometimes, I just cudnt believe I have been here... Instead of just flipping thru majalah Remaja and reading overseas students narratives about their experiences studying abroad *tis is wat I used to do when I was in high school*. And now... no doubt, I am one of them! Experiencing myself.. Bersyukur pada Allah... and thanks for those who believe in me, the govt, the uni, the dean, the school... and also for those who are always supporting me throughout my ups and downs. Hanya Allah je dapat balas semuanya.

Bila Eena membebel: Adusss, kalau nak bebel, mmg byk benda nak bebel. But I better not

Where's new entry???

2009-07-07T22:23:00.002+10:00

Wuoh, berhabuk dah blog nihhh....

Tried to update few days ago, but got some probs wit blogger and I cudnt post any new entry. Then, I am busy traveling around... Haaaa, will upload stories and pics when my hol is over. But for now, I am still in the mood of jalan2 Melbennnnnnn! *bawak hati yg duka lahhh konon*

Bila Eena membebel: Penat!!!Mo tido!

A reminder to myself...

2009-06-29T07:32:00.005+10:00

Just finished performing Subuh prayer. I woke up tis morning without anymore worry about unfinished academia task. Usually, I'll sit in front of my lappy right away after wake up from sleep. But not anymore... I dun have to slap my face to realize tis is not a dream. Yeah! I finally make it! Alhamdulillah...

It's been awhile... for me to think about joy and pleasure of doing things I like. Lama tak masak. Also, its been quite awhile since I hold my camera and snap pics around. Havent go shopping for quite awhile. And, I think I have missed my burfday tis year. Yup, I missed it. All I cud remember is... I was busy for the Media & Comm. essay submission on dat day. But, well... not like I'm a 7-yo kid who wanna blow a candle and get lotssaa presents, anyway. So? Not a big deal...

Wuoh, it's not only the end of June now. But it's also mid-Rejab now. Shud be fasting as much as I cud, I suppose. There are lotssaaa benefits for fasting in Rejab.

someone forwarded me tis via email

Mid-Rejab huh... Did anyone sees the moon last nite? It was beautiful. Subhanallah. I'm glad dat tis year... I'm gonna celebrate Ramadhan and Syawal with my beloved family. Altho dad is not really well. At least, I am there to take care of him. Mae pun nearly everyday call, asking where am I going to fly back home. InsyaAllah, papa, mae... I'll be going home soon. Please pray for my excellence and I'll be going home proud, showing you my degree I have earned after 2-years in Melbourne.

Cudnt wait for the result announcement... Haha, gilo hapo minah ni? Baru submit semua kuttt... lol. Yups, but I'm not fully relieved, not until I receive a formal result saying that I passed every subjects and eligible for graduation.

Academia is finally over... then what??? Apalagi... ronggeng laaarrr! *in other words, ganti balik semua hutang tido, hutang joy*.

Bila Eena membebel: Hari ni rasa nak hibernateeeee jer. Ngan cuaca sejuk lagi.. duhh, mmg cun!

Finally...

2009-06-29T00:12:00.002+10:00

Alhamdulillah, I have completed the final piece of assessment for the semester *and for my masters study, insyaAllah*. It was a very hectic one. Couldn't believe I finally make it! I'm going to bind it and officially submit by Tuesday. Feeling? Happy? Excited? Relieved? Partially, I would say. At least, not until the result announcement. Not until it is officially announced dat m gonna graduate tis semester. 2 weeks time... gonna be another painful waiting period. But I have done my very best. And now... just tawakkal.

-----

I received a call from my mom tis evening. She asked me to call her back. Her voice was deep and slow at dat time. I started to get worry and straight dial her number. As I was expected, it is about my dad. My mom told me, few days ago, doctor asked my dad to go for an extensive medical check-up. Based on the med.examination, doctor found out dat my dad's kidneys are no longer fully works and doctor also suggested my dad to double-up his daily injection dosage. Hurmhh... ofcoz I'm worry about him. I have decided to not to stay for the graduation, and leaving soon after the result announcement and after I have done with all the administrative matters. with dat, m expecting to leave Melbourne in the first week of August.

-----

I have about a month-time before leaving home for good *insyaAllah!*. I haven't decided much on the things I wanna do before I leave. But there are several things for sure; to get as much as possible support letters from the Criminology's academics, to buy graduation robe, to snap photos around the uni, to spend time with Criminology colleagues, and to take photos with Crim academics and especially, my supervisor, Dr. Juliet. I am more flexible about the schedule to travel around. I will try to spend as much time as possible to go to places I haven't been before especially within Melbourne. Actually, it is not really a big deal to me. I am thankful enuff for the opportunity to live in Melbourne for 2 years, gaining a very precious experience as an international student in a prestigious university, the University of Melbourne. But one think I surely wont forget is the cold weather in Melbourne. I definitely gonna miss the beautiful autumn, lovely spring and cold winter experiences when I'm back to Msia. Duhhh seyes... cepatnya 2 thn!!!

-----

Wuoh, m sooooo tired. Its been few days *or maybe weeks????* I haven't sleep well. I think... I better off to bed now. ZZzZzzzzzZZzzZz...... gudnite.

Bila Eena membebel: ZzzzZzzzZzz...

layannnn~

2009-06-24T23:42:00.002+10:00

one of my fav band. and one of my fav song. selain evanescence. layannnn...

Couldn’t save you from the start
Love you so it hurts my soul
Can you forgive me for trying again?
Your silence makes me hold my breath
All the time has passed you by

For so long, I’ve tried to shield you from the world
You couldn’t face the freedom on your own
Here I am
Left in silence

You gave up the fight
You left me behind
All that stands forgiven
You’ll always be mine
I know deep inside
All that stands forgiven

Watched the clouds drifting away
Still the sun can’t warm my face
I know it was destined to go wrong
You were looking for the great escape
To chase your demons away

For so long, I’ve tried to shield you from the world
You couldn’t face the freedom on your own
Here I am
Left in silence

You gave up the fight
You left me behind
All that stands forgiven
You’ll always be mine
I know deep inside
All that stands forgiven

I’ve been so lost since you’ve gone
Why not me before you?
Why did fate deceive me?
Everything turned out so wrong
Why did you leave me in silence?

You gave up the fight
You left me behind
All that stands forgiven
You’ll always be mine
I know deep inside
All that stands forgiven

Bila Eena membebel: Just layan je ler... takyah bebel.

i'm socially paralyzed!

2009-06-24T22:47:00.003+10:00

wuoh! duno where to start. i try to think.. when was the last i hapdet tis blog *or, open tis blog*? or, when was the last I caught a tram and went to the city *paling dekat la... itu pun rasa dah 'jauh'*. and i just cudnt recall it. feels like yearsssss ago. owh sangat tipu. but yes, its been awhile. awhile. so, where i've been all tis time? u cudn't believe me, or at least, i cudnt believe it either... most of the time, i am just in tis rum and the library *which happen to be like 1o0metre away from my apartment?*. what, for 1 month? 2months? wuoh! sounds scary!

but, at least... when mom and dad call, asking and worrying about swine flu epidemic, i cud say dat, well, they dun to worry much i guess. coz the most crowded place i ever been all tis while is... the uni. the library.

been studying soooo hard lately. like hell. but i dun have much choice.

i dun have time to throw a party for my own bufday.

no one ever invites me for any outing anymore.

some even create my busy-ness as excuses for not telling or fake-inviting me to join their trip watsoever.

i'm not trying to make myself invisible.
but yeah, i think i am invisible to everyone now.

and yeah, i am officially Miss B now. shoot!

how do i feel? wat do u think? ouh, i am sooooo not telling you wat i feel. we are all grown-ups. and tis is part of our life. no offense. no judgment.

its the 24th today. in a month-time, its going to be my 2nd years in melbourne. 2 years... wuoh. i cudnt imagine it. feels like sooo yesterday i just arrived here, with a large luggage and a backpack on my shoulder. alone. and in a month-time, i think dats what gonna happen. carrying a large luggage... with a backpack. alone? not so sure yet. but yeah, time's just like flash. extremely fast! after 2 years celebrating ramadhan n eid away from beloved family, tis year am going to celebrate it with them. so i shud b positive about finishing huh.

Wuoh, i shudnt be like tis. instead, i shud be exciting as i am going to submit my dissertation in a day or two. Finally, huh. Yeah, finally.

Mom calls nearly everyday. Hoping dat I'm going home soon. InsyaAllah, mae... along akan balik. Tak lama dah pon...

yup, tak lama lagi....

Bila Eena membebel: ???????

kawan atau lawan...

2009-06-15T23:30:00.006+10:00

which one do you prefer...

someone who called a FRIEND but only there for you where they need me, OR
someone who called ENEMY but always there to encourage you to be a better person

which one do you prefer...

someone that you deemed as a close FRIEND, but always keep things from you, OR
someone who is clearly an ENEMY, but tells you nearly everything (eventho just to show off)

which one do you prefer...

you have a FRIEND, but he/she makes you cry without any regret, without sorry, OR
you have an ENEMY, a clearly an enemy... who makes you cry coz he/she purposely doing dat to you..

which one MAKES YOU HAPPY...

to have a FRIEND ONLY at its name, OR
to have an ENEMY dat you always compare with

Do you really thing that you are a FRIEND of mine?
Do you ever dare to say that I am your FRIENDwhen you did such things to me?
Do you ever value me even as a person, with feelings?

If you're NOT,
never say I am your FRIEND.
please... dun pretend to be.

Better stop before FRIEND turn to be more than ENEMY. And... sorry, I dun have words for that kind of person *at least, I still consider you as a person. A cruel person tho*. And, sorry also... I have no space in my heart for such person *at least, I cud still remember my ENEMY*.

BTW, I love both colors, yellow and red. Daaaaaa....

Bila Eena membebel: Nape? Rasa laen macam ke ngan entry ni? Agagagagagaaaaaaaaa.. takde pape la. Tetiba terpk. Tp kalau ada yg terasa tu, minta mahap laaaaa ye. Sila minum air byk2, kalau pedas.

I'm getting there with slow, deep and confidence voice

2009-06-15T03:26:00.002+10:00

Hurmh... I'm going to submit another piece of essay today and it's going to be my final essay for the semester. Or to be more accurately, the final essay for my master's study. Despite the up-and-down I have gone thru this 1-and-half years, I finally reach this level. I have to admit dat it is nothing close to easy to reach what I have today. It needs a lot of hard work, focus and motivation. And the most important, the passion to success in doing the thing. It is not dat simple when I say 'the thing' but it means a lot to me. Another scroll of degree. Only those who really have the guts will choose this way instead of being together with the loved ones, to build a family and probably to gain money and field experience. I probably missed lotssaa funs in my life and I dunno whether tis is the best for me, but I always believe that everything always happens for a reason. The most important is to enjoy whatever you do; and despite the many says people pointed at me, here I would like to express my confession; I really am happy with the thing I'm doing right now. Studying, studying and studying. Spend the night in the library, working on academias, and to do lotssaaa research and studies. It may sounds tiring and exhausting for many of you and I never wud say anything coz everyone has different passions and interests.

In a nutshell, I am happy.

I think, dats the most basic question we shud ask ourselves; are we proud to be ourselves and who we are? are we happy with the things we do in everyday life? is there ever any meaning to the things you're doing yesterday, today and tomorrow? To me, it is very simple. Doing things without any meaning, itulah yang paling menyedihkan. One day, some of us will sit and think... "ntah, kenapa aku study ntah." "ntah, nyesal aku tak sambung study dulu kan...." "hurmh, nape aku tak study betul2 dulu kan"

I believe... in every doings, we shud be driven with some motivations and aspirations, and then only your life will be meaningful.

Ye lah, ada ke org
tak tahu kenapa dia nak kawen?
tak tahu kenapa dia suka shopping?
tak tahu kenapa dia suka travel?

or as simple as...
tak tahu kenapa dia makan and tido?

haiyoohhh sah sah la at least sebab lapar n ngantuk.

With the final essay submission, I have my biggest piece of assessment left, the dissertation. My deepest gratitude to those who have made recommendations on related title (of movies and dramas) to my study. Only Allah could pay your interest and support. And as my part, I am doing my very best to complete the dissertation and expecting to submit the full dissertation by the end of the month. I hope my best will worth something and I am sooooo looking forward for the graduation. To be frank, sometimes I dun feel like I can complete all these... especially tis final semester - it has been real challenging and tough. If not, I wont be here in the library while most of the people in Melbourne enjoy dreaming. But despite all the hard times and many criticisms I have received, I think tak salah rasanya if I would say that I am proud with what I have achieved in these 2-years, as a full-sponsored scholar - sekurang2nya aku dah jalan tanggungjawab sosial aku dengan menggunakan duit rakyat dengan sebaiknya, mengutip pengalaman and mendapatkan ijazah dengan baik. Tanpa scholarship ni, tak mungkin aku kan sampai ke sini. Tanpa scholarship ni, aku mungkin masih di USM, dengan pengajian pasca-siswazah tempatan seperti yg lain.

Oh Allah, I have done my best. And I cannot thank you enuff for this precious opportunities. I always believe that You have arranged something for me... and I believe that 'something' is the best for me.

Bila Eena membebel: Still kat library... and I need to get back to my work. Juliet once says "Rose, we started to see the result of your hard work. Continue your hard work and never lose faith in yourself".

hello from the uni...

2009-06-12T07:46:00.003+10:00

lebam, mmg lebam. I'm still in the uni at the time I'm writing this. Been staying here all nite *to be more precise, I was here in the library since the afternoon, around 230pm and went back home for dinner, like an hour before again be in the library*, working on my stuffs... and to be honest, I am amazed with myself. I dunno I can stand studying the whole nite, seating in front this pc... And, its been about more than 12hours I havent sleep yet. Gila? FYI, ini la Eena... kalau dah mud gila nak study *padahal bukan rajin study, tp sbb sgt sgt terlalu terlalu byk keje*. Sila salahkan library yg buka 24hours, occay. Agagagagaaa...

my brain is really exhausted now. the clock shows its already 10minutes before 8am. if you ask me what am i thinking about now... I have 1 answer; SLEEP. Definitely will sleep for a couple hours before back to work. Dahsyat betul rasa. But its occay... as long as I cud complete my study on time. At least, I am confident when I pray "tawakkaltu 'al Allah" coz I have put my very best effort on tis. Yelah, there is not point praying and asking for success if we dun put enuff efforts to achieve our dream rite? I'm just doing my best... and hoping dat my best worth something.

shoot... it's really cold. eventho I chose pc quite far from the entrance, I cud feel the freezing wind blowing as people enter to the library. dun laugh at me if i'm saying dat I have to put gloves and shawl on my neck... and never leave my jacket off. luckily i have this fingerless glove, so i can use kibod easily. however, am not saying that i dun like winter. in fact, i am very fortunate that Allah gives me another chance to experience winter in Melbourne, before leaving home for good. Sometime i just cudn't believe that tis is my 3rd winter in Melbourne. 2007 (when I was just reach melbourne in late July), last year, 2008 and tis year. Wuoh. Its been like flash! And thinking of finishing my study in the end of this month make me thinking of... wuoh, how i wish i cud spend more time around to enjoy my life here WITHOUT any other commitments, but just to travel around. Dan yang pasti... dengan poket yg penuh. Agagagaga... leh ke gitu? Berangan la cik Eena!!! Slap, Slap! Ni la akibatnya kalau tak tido. Agagagaga..

InsyaAllah, I will keep this momentum and complete all my works. Kawan2, tolong doakan sama k?

Bila Eena membebel: Student dah mula memenuhi uni... ramai yg baru sampai... mesti diorang terpk, awalnya aku datang lib. padahal... tak balik pon. baru nak balik ni ha. agagagagagagaaa..

Mission: Home made pizza ACCOMPLISHED!

2009-06-10T22:20:00.001+10:00

it's been awhile since i really wanna make home-made pizza. and today... after got home from spending the whole afternoon in the uni, i took some time off from books and went to the kitchen. experimenting with flour and stuffs. And taraaaa! Siap!!! Not one, not two... but THREE! I made one chicken pizza and two seafood pizzas (crab stick with prawn).

So... shall I say "goodbye Sahara, goodbye BigSam..." * these are restaurants at Brunswick that I used to go with frenz for halal pizza*. I mean.. yeah, it is much much safer if you eat foods you cook by yourself rite? Plus, with the scarily, Swine flu epidemic in Victoria... I am sooooooo prefer to eat home-based cook.

Haha, I know. Some of you might been saying dat... "heh eena ni, kata busy sangat ngan keje skolah. sempat gik dia turun dapur masak itu ini." Haaaa, if I dun cook, then what am I going to eat? Tell me... should i spend around 20dollars/day for lunch+dinner (outside) OR should I cook by myself once in a day so dat I can have it as my lunch n dinner?

-----

Wuoh.... I can hardly wait til the time I finish every writing (i mean my essays and dissertation) and simply shout "Hooooooorraaayyyy!!!", or perhaps the best... to spend the whole day on bed. Agagagagaaaa... Come on Eena, few more to go! U're getting there! Almost there... keep the spirit and dynamics. InsyaAllah! Everything will be over very soon... =)

Bila Eena membebel: Cepat... mmg cepat masa berlalu. Dah nak 2 thn ke aku duk sini? Macam baru semlm je aku jejak kaki kat Melbourne. Tak puas lagi rasanya menikmati kehidupan kat sini.

One fine morning... fine kah?

2009-06-10T08:49:00.005+10:00

Wuoh, salam everyone!~

My schedule is really pack these days... and am expecting tis busy-ness will continue till the end of the month. This morning I woke up lazily. It's been raining the whole nite. I mean, a heavy rain. So what??? Hello... heavy rain in Melbourne is not a usual phenomenon occay. While I was expecting lotssssa rains during the autumn with strong wind *just like last year*, it's just being another freaking weather change tis year. This year, Melbourne has created its own history for the coldest autumn (in 50 years?) when there were snow falling in several places. And again... the first week of June 2009, again we cud evident a freaking winter opening in Melbourne with raining nearly everyday. Last nite alone, perghhh... hujan punyalah lebat.

The weather change isn't really the issue to me. But with the freaking cold rainy-winter, I'm a bit afraid with the fact that now Victoria is leading in the reported Swine Flu cases in Australia. The latest update by the Health Emergency of the Australian Governments, Dept of Health and Ageing reported that the total confirmed Swine Flu cases in Australia has reached 1,211 (up to June 9, 2009). And the statistics provided made me even more worried.. with the breakdown came from Victoria!

The national breakdown was (up to June 9th, 2009): WA 20, NT 6, Tas 9, ACT 10, SA 13, Qld 53, NSW 89, Vic 1,011.

*Kawan2 in Melbourne, and Australia , keep update!!! You guys can get more info in this webbie: CLICK:Dept. of Health and Ageing, Aust. Govt. And eventho statistics tu agak mengerikan, dun get panic and take over-precautions. This is true as the dept also reported reverse-cases where people started to get panic and take medications yang tak berkenaan. Jadi kes lain, naya jerrrr... Semoga kite semua dijauhkan la dr penyakit2 nihhh... But if your body begins to show any of the symptoms, cpt2la gi clinic and get proper vaccines *as they are available - general vaccine tho, for confirmed cases*.

Source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:PD_Diagram_of_swine_flu_symptoms_EN.svg

Cant u see how serious Swine Flu in Victoria is? I can only pray for the a good health and I'd prefer to spend most of the time either at home or the farthest, the uni (which happened to be just across my apartment). And luckily, examination weeks has just started and there're not many students around, I mean in the place where I use to chill out in the uni *chill out kah kalau ngadap buku n keje je.. agagagaga*.

And today, again I spend my day-time in the uni. Lately, I have changed my schedule. Sleep early.... or the latest, by 1230midnite. Then wake up early in the morning and straight to the uni. By 730am, I'm already in the uni. Quiet... and I can choose the best place to do work. So far, I'm comfortable with tis routine as Melbourne gets dark earlier than before *coz winter has just begun*. With the frequent raining, I cant hardly see the sun and it seemed to be evening all day.

Duh, duh... Sorry but I really have get back to my work now. Will try to update this poor blog again some time later. Till then, daaaaaaa. Salam!

Bila Eena membebel: lapar la puleekkk! Ni la penyakit musim sejuk. Tapi bila dah makanan depan mata, takleh habis lak. Tak selera lak. Ngade! Ni gara2 stress keje la ni. Duh!

Duhhhh lahai... sabar la wahai hati!~

2009-06-07T19:21:00.002+10:00

Wake up. Works/Online. Eat. Works/Online. Sleep. Wake up. Works/Online. Eat. Works/Online. Sleep. Wake up. Works/Online. Eat. Works/Online. Sleep. Wake up. Works/Online. Eat. Works/Online. Sleep. Wake up. Works/Online. Eat. Works/Online. Sleep. Wake up. Works/Online. Eat. Works/Online. Sleep. Wake up. Works/Online. Eat. Works/Online. Sleep. Wake up. Works/Online. Eat. Works/Online. Sleep. Wake up. Works/Online. Eat. Works/Online. Sleep. Wake up. Works/Online. Eat. Works/Online. Sleep. Wake up. Works/Online. Eat. Works/Online. Sleep. Wake up. Works/Online. Eat. Works/Online. Sleep.

If I really wanna update what I am up to tis days... that was it. Boring. Plain. Dull. But... dats it. Nothing much, mothing less *mandi, masak, sembang ngan rumet... tu tak perlu elaborate la kut*.

And currently... am about to go to sleep. Nop, nop. Just napping. Zassssss...!

Bila Eena membebel: Bertambah bahagia bila sekali-skala rumet ku rajin masak... arini dapat merasa kari. Perghhh!

DAng!!! A quick update...

2009-06-07T02:00:00.006+10:00

Phew… it’s been really tough days for me lately. Lotsa works and I cud hardly see any progress. And the submission dates become closer and closer… make me hardly breathe. Shooot!!! I wish I could have lot more times to work on these essays. But in the mean time, I wish it could be faster for me to end all these things. I wanna graduate now!!! Grrrr!

Why it is sooo hard for me to work on these (especially these 2 pieces) of essay …? I’ve been trying all kinda positions to make myself comfy to work on these stuffs; sit on the bed, sit at my study table, sit on the floor, work in the lab, sit in the middle of the crowd in the library… bla bla bla… And yet!!! Gosh! I dunno why it is soooo hard for me tis semester, unlike the previous semesters I had in UniMelbourne. And the closer the deadline is… the more panicking I am now. I knw I shudnt so tht I can concentrate on my works… but… erghhhh!!! Stress! I wish… I wish…I could have registered for another subjects and not tis kinda subjects; POLITICS! Shootttt!

Hurmh… However, despite of hectic life I had, still I have time to spend in the kitchen. Agagagaga… Why not? If I dun cook, what am I going to eat, rite? With the cold season nowadays *yayyyy dah winter!*, my tummy always makes dat sound… alaaar… dat sound, u know. Bunyi mintak diisi. Uhuhuuhu…

Yesterday… I feel like wanna eat Soto and without thinking much, I just have alook what I have in the fridge and taraaa… mission accomplished! Soto siap, cikkk! Besh, besh… Tak padan ngan sibuk! Yeah, wake up in the morning; prepare foods for the whole day and by afternoon, I could start concentrate on my works. Better than I’m going out… makan belum tentu sedap, kuar duit utk kenyang yg sementara, and… lebey teruk, tak tahan ngan godaan shopping. Agagaggaa.. So, plus minus, I better cook by myself. Puas ati! And dang!!! I have gain some more weights! Occay, occay… dun comment k. :P

Today, I went out for a lunch together at one of my friend’s apartment - Sharifah.

:: tak sempat masuk rumah sharifah, dah habis posing2 dulu ::

Woah, it was a luxury, expensive apartment in the middle of Melbourne city- Blue Tower Apartment. At first, I didn’t wanna join the event, but as Sharifah was specifically invite and request for my attendance. Yelah, sian lak. She’ll be going home for winter break on the 23^rd of June; of course everyone still busy with exams and projects on that time. Lucky you, Sharifah! No exam, and complete your semester this early! Jelesnyaaaaa!

::view dr rumah si sharifah::

Sharifah made delicious lasagna, Singapore’s Fried Bihun, tandoori chicken, and caramel pudding. Yummy! Amrah, another friend of mine brought her special choc. pudding and Kak Ina, with her usual Bubur Kacang Ijau. Duhhh, aktiviti makan lagi. Tak hengattttt!!! It is nothing surprising if I gain some weight… Hah, I dun care! So why do you care? Lol.

::Me and Baby Imran. Isnt he cutie pie? *semua org maklum aku mmg suka budak2::

:: me and rumet. hepi hour *tak hengat keje berlambak kat bilik. aduss* ::

::apa sengey2 cik eena! balik bilik, keje dah tunggu! duhh::

Occay la… I really need to get back to my work *or perhaps to bed???*. Erghhh, stress melanda!

Bila Eena membebel: Arghhhh... tensi tensi ngan kejoooo!

I'm drown into some nostalgic memories..

2009-06-04T01:48:00.006+10:00

Sorry guys. Dun have much time to write today. But I'd like to share with you guys these pics which has been uploaded by a friend of mine. These were our pictures during my school time, with our beloved teacher, Pn. Faridah Mingan and Pn. Hidayah. Make me wondering.. where they are now. It's been awhile since I was trying to track them down. Not only Pn. Faridah and Pn. Hidayah, but most of my school teachers. InsyaAllah... when I'm going home for good, will trying to look for them. To me, they are more than teachers; can be my mom and even friends *hak hak, tingat dulu join cikgu2 bergossip. besh besh*.

Note: Cishhhh, rumet... leh lak gelakkan muka aku masa skolah. Tau la muka inesen. Agagagaga... takleh blah!

Especially Pn. Faridah, she was the one who opened me such a great opportunity; where I was being given a chance to represent the school for a selection at the district/state level to go to Nagoya, Japan - when I was in form 4. It was such a dream at that time... but now, it's definitely a sweet memory;after been selected from hundreds of candidates and only 8 of us were selected to represent Selangor/Msia to Nagoya; for a free-student exchange program.

Then tis bring me to the memories I had in Nagoya, Japan; with my foster families (Miho Kamiya and family, and Momoyo Murata and family). Miho is a year older than me, while Momoyo is about 3 or 4 years younger than me; and with representative friends of both Msia and Nagoya. Woah, how I miss them... I still been in touch with Miho but not with Momoyo. It's really hard to keep in touch with Momoyo as she was really young at dat time and english was definitely a big barrier. But despite the language difficulties, I knw she really enjoyed the time we had together and love my family (and me especially, ahaksss) as she was crying when I was about to leave *padahal sama2 nanges, agagagagaaaa*. Lately, I also been able to track back two or three other representative friends from Msia (there were 8 of us... but I manage to contact Kak Siti Hajar n Shakil, the rest... ntah ke mana skrg).

Occay, occay. I better not to get drown tooooo deep. Or else, I wont finish my work. lol.

Will definitely update again later. Till then, tata!

Bila Eena membebel: Tiut je rasa bila Mey tepon, ngomel2 sakit gigi pas makan kek besday dia and chocolate, adiah dr papa and adik2. Tak pasal2.

Happy Burfday Mey!

2009-06-03T02:51:00.004+10:00

Head-Note: Owh... Mey referred to my mom, a way of Thai people call their mom. Me and siblings used to call our mom with that.

me and mom *dan beberapa pelakon tambahan, hiks* masa kat Chiangmai aritu.

It's June 3rd today. And it is my mom's burfday. Called her rite away after I went back from FrankTate. 2am here = 12midnite Msia. As usual, busy burfday gal, we had to queue to wish her happee burday. Hot tak hot la... Anak2 je ada 8. Semua queue nak call, nak wish. I'm glad to hear her voice; cheer and happy. And she made me laugh with her every year story... "Kekasih mey je blom kol. ntah ingat ntah tak... papa kamu tu, kekadang dah habis bg hint pun tak igt gak...". Adoyaiii... Itu la ngomel mey tiap tahun. But soon after I hang up the phone, mom called me back. And do you wanna knw what she said?

"Nak citer ni... tadi papa kamu yang tepon. Dia kata ntah sapa set alarm kat phone dia. Tak tahu ada apa ngan 3hb, tapi terpk tengok passport mama yang ada kat bilik tu. Baru tingat it's mom's burfday. Papa kamu siap ngomel2... biasa la org tua, mana nak igt semua..."

Aku hanya tersenyum. =)

mey ngan kekasihnya *agagaagaga, my dad larr*

Another special thing about tis day and tis month is...
my mom was born in 1962, me pulak 1982 *ngam2 ja beza 20 thn*
and both of us, were born in June.
my mom's burfday was on the 3rd, and me pulak on the 17th *ngam2 the next 2 weeks*

So, say if my mom turn 47 tis year *muda lagik rupanya mak aku ni. leh dapat adik lagi ni. ahahahaha*... me pulak will turn into 17 this year *lagikla muda, semestinya*... erkkk!!! Salah ke? Angggap je la betul yerk :P Agagagagaga...

korek punya korek, ada gak pic kitorang berdua. hanya kitorang berdua. pic len semua tinggal kat msia.

Btw, still wanna wish my mum again... HAPPEE BURFDAY Mey!!! *bagi font kaler purple... sbb dia suka kaler purple, hikss* Love u muchie muchie!

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Tunggu je la adiah tu ye... Lmbt lak si Afi tlg belikan. By weekend ada la tu. Wink Wink! Seprais Seprais!

Bila Eena membebel: Rindunya kek strawberry yang mey slalu buat...

About yesterday... about some time ago...

2009-06-02T21:28:00.005+10:00

I've been always talking about future. About the hope. About dream. About what am I going to achieve. All sounds to be at least in the present and most are about future. When I read one of the article *somewhere, somewhere... coz I like to begin my day with reading stuffs*, I began to think something when I was looking at the title, something sound like tis... "Just forget the past...". Simple topic, but bring me to many things.

First and foremost, I'd like to say *or perhaps argue*, shall we really forget the past? Is that really the right thing to do? And, even if you wanna forget, how much you can forget something you really hope u're going to forget one day? In what capacity and how? All I know, the more you wanna forget something, the more the memory will stuck into your head *and interestingly, conversely... even we try very hard to memorize notes but punya lahhhh payah - mcm2 cara buat nota la, sng ckp.. ahaksss*.

And... this is also reminds me part of the Garner's dialogue in 13 Going 30 (in a conversation with her mom),
"Mom, if you could get back to the past, would you turn to that and correct what u've done?" *ahhh lebey kurang gitu ler. tak igt pulak exact dialogue kan*.

And I like what her mom had replied to her...
"No.".

Garner was all confused and asked again,
"Why?"

Ganer's mom sempoi je jawab...
"Coz if not, I will never learn from my wrongs".

Memang sempoi but deep and meaningful. I totally agree with her answer.

Some wish badly from God to forget their past. Some even pray everyday, hoping they have no such memory of the past.

But...

Why aren't we learning from the past? Why make it such a burden and keep regretting?

Everyone has their own past.

I feel pity for those who have lost their memory due to disease or accident (and things like dat). Unfortunately, people like dat always try their best to get their memory back, while some others really ask for the memory to simply fly away...

Why aren't we never satisfied and thankful with what we already had? Why we keep comparing ourself with other and pressure ourself out of our own limit?

Tepuk dada, tanya selera.

It took me sometime thinking about tis, in the afternoon. But I have decided, to never regret with anything and just wanna live my life happily and enjoy my life on my own way. Do things as I've planned and achieve things I dream of, and not comparing myself with others. The past have taught me a lot and I always be someone better than myself yesterday. Everyday I wake up and always pray for something better.

-----

As usual, I am spending my nite in the student's learning center @FrankTate Building in the uni. I have to discipline myself and keep the promise... to go to the uni and complete everything on time. Unfortunately, it's been 2 nights already since the security guard chased me away *hahaha...* due to some misunderstanding. I thot *and some other students also feels annoying as I did* this place is open 24-hours coz it was once open 24/7 to all students. But today when I checked the website, I found out that tis learning space is only open up to 2am. So, instead of coming around 11pm, I came here earlier after having a shortwhile nap.

*tempat lepak everyday. btw, semua pon gambar cilok... - credit to the uni portal*

Yelah, afternoon in the library, nite at the learning center. Nak kata terpaksa tu... terpaksa gak la. 2 essays due at the same time, the same date. And both are not my area of interest nor my expertise.

Talking about "terpaksa"... There was once... when I talked to this one man; young, successful and economically stable, family-man with 2 kids. After talking about his successful life, he asked me; "you study pun sbb terpaksa kan? brapa u dapat sebulan at your age now?". Duhhh... manusia... I dun think I wanna continue typing down the following dialogs. Biarlah aku je yg tahu. I never have any problem with him... and farrrrr from feeling sorry to myself for not being as successful as he did when he was in my age. Hell-oooo... I'm happy with my life and this is what I really want to be doing in my life. Sometimes, when I think again... what was his motive, talking to me dat way... Hanya Tuhan je tahu.

Well, I received two emails from Juliet today. She's really concern with my progress now. Am very glad to have her as my supervisor. Tho she was just recently received her Ph.D., I can say that she looks like she had been supervising students for many years. The way she supervise and assist me, fuhhh... mmg tabik spring toing toing toing lar! Rasa mcm nak bagi bintang kehormat je kat dia. Kalau aku leh jumpa Sultan, mmg aku minta dia dianugerahkan jadi Dato' daripada bg kat ShahRukhKhan tu. Apakah significant nya? Lu pikirla sendirik....

Woah.. m still working on my "Corruption" essay. Seriously challenging. I have to admit dat I am not a politics fan. So it is such a great challenge to me, coz I need to approach the task given from the political perspective. Not just raw-political discourse but into a deeper political theories and the application of the political understanding into the discourse of corruption. Can't imagine how's Benny, Emily, Josephine and Shelly working on this piece. Poor criminology students... they must be as lost as me at this time. Can't imagine Emily's hate-face. It will make me laugh, everytime I remember dat face. She's one of my crim. colleague... seriously hate Corruption subject. often ask me to skip the lecture. Agagagaga... How I miss them all. Everyone just keep silence at the moment, focusing on the completion of all essays. And this semester will be the final semester for at least half of us. Me, Benny, Shelly... Some have already left (the uni and some, the country); Fareed, Vincci, Cherry, Ahmed, Maryanna, Vincent... I hope that I cud spend some time with colleagues who still in Melbourne before leaving home for good. Poor Benny... he's been asking for movie quite a number of time but I am busy with my thesis project. Occay, we shall spend time together after all the submissions! Dats my promise!

And yeah.. another thing. Me, Benny and Shelly have planned to buy the Graduation Robe as our personal collection and as a memory. I'm interested to buy but haven't check on the price yet. Will check it some time later.

-----

I better write-off now. Continue doing my work. Will definitely write again later. Till then, salam!

Bila Eena membebel: Menghitung hari... detik demi detikkkk.... tik tok teko, tik tok teko... erkk!

study mode~

2009-06-01T23:24:00.005+10:00

Hi and salam from the Frank Tate Student Space... *yerp, I'm updating from the uni*

Study week has officially began with the final lecture last week. Meaning dat... it's time for students here to get ready for the exam - which mostly scheduled to begin next week.

As for me, I dun have any written examination. I dun have to make notes and memorize things. I dun have to check exam timetable. I dun have to worry about getting my stationary complete for the purpose of the examination.

Then?

I am a total social science student now. Which means.... I'm dealing with lotsaaaa theories, philosophy and working on essays and project. While everyone else busy doing cute notes *which I used to do it before, duhhh rindunya zaman itu*. Tak kesahla... whichever method of assessment and examination it is, the most important thing now is... it's really the time for me to finish everything I should be doing for the semester.

I had meeting with Juliet in the afternoon. Woah! And am glad it was a great session, and we're going to have one last meeting in three weeks time for the final submission. But still... I need to work a lot more harder. I agree with Juliet, it's not pass that we're concern about... but H1! Yups! Really like her style! InsyaAllah, I'll do my best *I mean... my very best!* and will make her proud of me.

Later after meeting with Juliet, I got home and then only I remember I had to return a number of books to the library. So I went to the uni again, to get to the Bailleu library. When I was at the inter-library loan counter, I accidentally met Dr. Julie Evans, one of the lecturer in Criminology Dept. I used to take one of her subject last year and I was surprised that she cud exactly remember my name. We had a lil chat before we cont with our own work later. What else make you proud than to be remembered by such an important people in the department... I feel honored. Not only she cud remember my full name... but also details about my thesis project. It reminds me of my proposal presentation to the Dept's member and my presentation during the research seminar. Am happy when people appreciate my hard work and interested in my work. Especially... when they are not a student, but academicians with years and years of experience in the field. I feel seriously comfy... no gaps between lecturers and students. We cud casually talk about each other's project and updates. There are few names I won't ever forget... Dr. Stuart Ross, Assoc. Prof. Adam Sutton, Assoc. Prof. Fiona Haines, Dr. Mark Brown, Dr. Juliet Rogers (of course...) and Dr. Julie Evans (yes!)...

Definitely something I'm going to miss when m going home...

Duhh... I better stop nagging in here.

I wont update much about what I ate today. Ahahaha... cuti la update pasal makan sekali-sekala. SIkit lagi, blog ni dah jadi blog masakan lak. Lagipun, today I was cooking Laksa yang sangat dahsyat. Was rushing and kuah laksa tu agak dahsyat... bukan takde rasa, cuma blend tak hancur. Mcm makan duri2 lak sbb tulang ikan tak hancus. Adus... kalau bg mak mertua makan, mmg confirm kena reject awal2. Kantoi den! Dah lama tak bikin laksa katakan. Takpe, takpe. Takde sapa pon makan selain dr perot ni n rumet ku itu. Next time, buat lagi... wink!

It's time! Daaaaaaaaaaaaaa...

Bila Eena membebel: Nak stay for convo atau tidak... nak stay atau tidak... nak ke tak nak.. sebulan setengah gak tu... stay? tak? stay? tidakkk? stayyy la! tak?? adusss. smayang istikharah la kut!

A day before the real war begins!

2009-05-31T22:01:00.004+10:00

Fuhhh, wat a topic. Me? War? Not quite relevant there. Watever....

Gosh! It's already the end of May.. I mean, real end of the May! *psycho betul aku dibuatnya!!!*. In an hour and so... the calendar will change into June! The month of the real war... going to begin!

What does it mean, Eena? *I knw you'd ask me dat*

NO MORE outing
*sebelum ni ada gak curik2 masa utk windowshopping bukan ler tak keluar langsung2, tp nak berjalan sana sini tu... takde la ye kawan2. sekian terima kasih!*

NO MORE procrastinating
*no more delays and excuses. i cant waste any and every single sec NO MORE*

NO MORE jolly-ing, party-ing
*sorry, but i wont have any more time to 'waste' tis month. shoot!*

NO MORE, NO MORE... NO MORE!!!

And, please... I really mean this.

I have 2 submissions on the 9th
I'll have submissions on every Saturday (until the end of June)
I'm going to submit one project on the 16th

And... I need to submit my masterpiece on the 30th June.

All I need to be doing now is... to FOCUS and remained FOCUS.

Really appreciate your understanding...

I need to be doing this if I want to complete my study on time.
And...

If I could remained focus and be on the right track *insyaAllah!*,

I'll be finishing the semester on the 30th of June!

Waiting for my result in the mid-July (as well as the confirmation for graduation).

All I need from you guys are ... moral support and lotssa prays.
*kalau nak kritik betapa gila study-nya aku pun, aku tak kesah lar. terima je. lagipun, korang cuma leh kritik, bukan tolong siapkan keje aku pon. bukan tahu nak wat keje aku cmana pon. and takde pekdahnya aku nak marah pada org yg tak faham bahse camtu*.

For all those, I'd like to thank you guys in advance *for both positive support and also negative critics*.

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Talking about FOCUS, it's pretty obvious dat I wasn't much into anything lately other than my books and academia tasks. And you guys may notice this as I kept uploading pics of what menu I had everyday. Haaa, dats what special about staying home. Coz I can spend my time eating my own cook and try different types of menu *which I can hardly get from the restaurant in Melbourne, not at least at any good price*. Plus, with the serious Swine Flu attack in Australia lately, I'd prefer to stay at home and eat a more guaranteed and safer foods (on my own).

Few days ago, my rumet was really craving into homemade Nasi Lemak. So, again, we had special Nasi Lemak - with massive side dishes; Chicken, Calamari, Prawn, Fries and Boiled Eggs. Tu dia... laut, darat, semua ada. Makan ke melantak? Lu pikirla sendiri... I could just laugh when my mom and friends saying dat it was like we're preparing meals for 8 people! Yeah but it is somehow true. Lately, me and my rumet are really into FOODS. Maybe bcoz of the cold weather, or... is it... No, No, No.

Today, we had simple Chicken Rice with Crisp Fried Chicken. As usual. But as for the dinner, I have made Burger Sambal (or some people call it, Burger Malaysia. Mana2 lah kan). I was thinking about making it bcoz we have some more sambal nasi lemak the other day. Plus, it's been quite awhile kut since I was last having Burger Sambal nih *and ofcoz masa kat Msia aritu ler. Sini mana nak ada jual*. Burp! Dahsyat... seriously kenyang!!!

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I've been seriously lacking of sleep tis few days. Yesterday, I was working straight from the morning till very late. I mean seriously late. How late? Can you imagine I was staying in the university's lab @FrankTate till about 3am in the morning? Yeah. Believe me... and tell me dat I wasnt busy enuff to spend my time going out for some other things instead of doing my academia works. Cudnt imagine how am I going to re-pay for every single secs I'm going out...elsewhere. I can. BUT ONLY if anyone would seriously offer me help, to do my bunch and bunch of reading and summarize it and draft it and write it into a proper complete work. At guarantee me with at least an H2A (A- score). Anyone? I couldnt hear anything. So...? So fa mi re do... Agagagagaaa... *perenggan ni sungguh stress bunyiknya... SANGAT! sila jangan terpengaruh and blame me for any depression symptom occurs. Agagagagag*.

Today, when I woke up... I just felt like wanna have a day off and stop thinking about serious things for awhile. JUST for awhile. So, I decided to go to the market, going out for a lil windowshopping in the city, buy some groceries at Laguna & Safeway and get some toilettries from the BigW. Tak ke mana sangat pon. Just going out to get some fresh air. And get bekalan2 before the war begins. Har har har. *gelak la... satgi sakit kepala. adusss!*

Me and Su, enjoying our Bubble Iced Tea

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Tomorrow I'm going to have another meeting with Juliet. Tentatively, I was planning to have a brief photography session with my rumet around the uni. But I had to cancel the plan coz I need to put my academic into my 1st priority. Sorry k rumet, mayb some other time. Cheers!

Gosh... I dunno why. But everytime I wanna meet Juliet, I'll be having this feeling. The feeling of... nervous-nya, risau-nya, debar-nya, takut-nya, senang cakap.. mcm2 ada lar. And I think tis feeling is normal coz this is something really big... big enuff to spoil the whole 1 and half years I've spent in the uni, if it end-up CRAP. I could only pray that everything will be going fine and smooth... and doing my very best! InsyaAllah!!!

Still... takutnyaaaaaaa nak jumpa Juliet esok!!! Erghhh...

Occay, occay... I better off to bed and sleep early tonite. Be prepare for tomorrow.

Welcome JUNE! I am all ready to begin the WAR! *duhhh lebam la den pasnihhh*.

Bila Eena membebel: Dah study week dah pun kawan2... ayuh la kita semua bangun dr. kelekaan dan berusaha ke arah yang terbaik dalam study kite. Just pass is not enuff, Excellent is our aim.

Lovely Thursday - Raining!

2009-05-28T15:03:00.006+10:00

It's raining again today, in Melbourne. Unlike yesterday *coz I was in the library and didnt even knw it was raining*, it feels seriously cold in here. But still, I love raining. Feels like wanna go out and shower myself under the rain. Crazy isn't it? No, I dun think the kids who likes to get themselves wet under the raining are crazy. I think it's one of the way of enjoying life. And... after all, raining is a bless, rite? Especially in Melbourne, with its conflict of water.

Actually I am seriously *serious, serious and seriously!* sleepy rite at tis sec. With the raining-cold, fulled-tummy and just looking at words *ngadap keje lar, apa lagi*... Isnt it weird? We often gets sleepy and tired when we are in the mid of doing our job or studying. But why arent we while we enjoy watching movies or going out for a date, for instance? I think, the keyword is... ENJOY. We wont get tired or busy when we enjoy doing something . As for me, I enjoy cooking. And alhamdulillah, never get sleepy while I cook. Mahu hancusssss jari-jemari ku yang halus mulus ni kalau ngantok sambil masak. Agagagaggagaa..

So, am I actually caught for being not-enjoying doing my work? Uhhhh... susah nak jawab. Well, not saying dat I'm not enjoying it. Hello, who the heck wont enjoy studying about love and romance? Just dat... sometimes, we, normal people, tend to get tired after hours and hours working on the same stuffs. Ni apatah lagi, dah berbulan2 ngadap benda yg sama. And luckily, I never get bored doing it. If not, I will be totally in a big problem. This is like a whole degree on itself, man! If I cudnt finish this thesis *nauzubillahhhhhh*, my one and half years in Melbourne will turn to be a huge crap. Meaningless and bla bla bla. NO! I will finish what I've started. Dats for sure. I'm positive about tis!

Duhhh la... even dah bebel2 pun still feel sleepy. U wanna knw what I've had for my lunch just now? Sempoi je... Ikan Masak Kicap Pedas. Just to finish up the fish I've bought last week.

And... I also tried to make Handmade Handroll Sushi; Chicken Popcorn Handroll. I have succeeded my first attempt to make handroll, so next time... I cud invite friends to try some. Avocado&Egg-roll ka, California-roll ka, apa2 je lar.. Akmal, U wanna learn how to make it rite? Occay je.. SIRIM dah lulus ni. Agagagagagaa... Takde kaitan!

Owh shoot! Seriously sleepy like hell. I better take a shortwhile nap. And then back to my work.

Pen-off.

Bila Eena membebel: Hebat betul dugaan ujan nihhh.... Dan ternyata aku tewas kali ni... ZzZZzzzzzz...

Ada orang tanya...

2009-05-27T14:48:00.003+10:00

In everyday life, kite mmg selalu bertanya... pada diri sendiri, pada kawan2, pada org di sekitar kite, dan juga pada org yg takde kaitan ngan kite (owh, specialnya org kite, mmg suka amek tahu pasal org len even tak kenal)...

Kekadang kite tertanya...

Bila la mo kaya? Ada kereta besh2... rumah besh2... duit byk2... shopping sakan... bla bla bla...

Sapa tak pernah terpk soklan ni? Meh cuba angkat kening sikit. Eksesais. Ada jawapan ke? Bagi aku senang je... Kaya tu ada kat kedai. Makan ngan roti besh, lagi2 buh margerin sikittt. Ok Ok mengong je jawapan! Well, ckp pasal kaya. Kaya tu subjective. Org dah kaya pun still rasa nak kaya lagi. Tak cukup2 lagi kaya. Yang kite ni jangan cakap la. Tp bagi aku, itu tak penting. Yang penting, hati mau happy. Happy ngan achivement kite sendirik. Dapat keje yang kite idamkan, dapat duduk dalam rumah yg bahagia ngan cukup kasih-sayang family, dapat spend masa untuk diri sendiri buat benda2 yg kite suka... tak kesahla shopping ke, travel around the world ke, tgk wayang ke... sesiput2 duk umah layan Astro je ke. Bagi aku, asalkan kite happy ngan life kite, kite dah cukup 'kaya' dan tak perlu la nak compare2 ngan life org len.

Tapi aku? Masih lagi dalam misi untuk kejar impian aku. Untuk dapatkan 'kekayaan' yang aku impikan tu. Kerjaya yang aku benar2 mahukan, dalam kepakaran Criminology, tanggung adik2 aku habis blajar, dan bawa parent duk dalam umah yg aku belikan. Kete dah belikan. Tunggu rumah lak ye papa, mama. InsyaAllah. Menjawab soklan ke tu? Adakah itu dah cukup 'kaya'? hello, I dun need a luxury house, bertingkat2 sampai org tua yg uzur menjerit minta tolong bila dia terjatuh kat dapur, tapi takde org dgr... I dun need Ferrari yang takleh nak muatkan papa mama aku (atau bakal anak2 aku di masa akan datang)... I dun need to be PM untuk tunjukkan aku ada kuasa dan kekayaan. And if I wanna be Dato' or any title, I want it to be based on my educational&academic credits... Penah dgr tak... "ilmu tu kekayaan yang sebenar"? Kalau tak penah dengar, ni la aku tolong cakap. Sila take note. Hello, I dun need to marry a Dato' and freely jadi Datin utk jadi kaya. If I want it, I'll earn it by myself.

Still tak menjawab soklan lagi? Apa soklan tadi? Bila mo kaya? Hurmhh... bila ye. Skrg pun leh kaya. Kalau tak kaya, takde la aku dapat shopping benda2 yg aku suka - compared to several years ago. Bila aku terpaksa menabung duit blanja skolah demi untuk beli senaskah novel. Kaya la jugak, compared to anak2 yang kurang bernasib baik, koyak rabik bajunya, makan nasi lauk kicap pun dah cukup bagus. Aku...? Makan tak hengat... duk sibuk nk jaga badan takut gemuk ada la. Tak cukup kaya lagi? Penting ke kaya, anyway? In fact, aku lebey cemburu tgk anak2 dr keluarga yang lebey kurang bernasib baik dr aku - still leh ketawa dan gembira di sisi keluarga diorang, stkt cukup makan dan berusaha tanpa putus asa, study jugak even tanpa biasiswa, tanpa ibubapa yang dapat tanggung diorang study ke overseas... Aku cemburu ngan ketawa derai mereka. Dan untuk itu... aku rasa bersyukur. Sangat bersyukur. Sekurang2nya, aku dapat gak tanggung adik2 aku... serba sedikit untuk perbelajaan skolah mereka.

Perlu tanya lagikah... bila mo kaya?

Bila aku dah bebel panjang2, then, org mula la pulak bertanya...

Eena/Rose, bila mo habis blajar?

Duhhh... mmg soklan pebret kalau aku btau aku masih blajar. Belajar dan mencari ilmu kan tak sepatutnya berhenti. Malah, kite patut belajar dan terus belajar sampai la kite pejamkan mata. Occay, occay. Tahu ler maksud korang... Hurmh, aku nak habiskan sampai dapat Ph.D. (Dr.Roslinya to be, insyaAllah). Dan, kalau leh, mmg nak jadi student je sampai bila2...

Dah jawab tu... orang tanya lagik.
Eena/Rose, tak penat ke study jerk?

Mmg suka betul org tanya soklan ni kat aku. Buat apa yg tak penat? Meh bgtau aku. Makan byk2 pun penat perut. Jogging lama2 pun penat kaki. Keje tiap ari pun penat. Tido lama2 pun penat tau! Lagi penat kalau duit tak masuk. Cuma, aku suka study. Kalau buat samting yg kite suka, adakah soklan tu relevan lagi? Cuba aku tanya balik... ko suka jalan2 kan, tak penat ke duit asek habis je? Haaa, pandai lak ko nak jawab... kepuasan lar, hobi lar, apa lar. Setiap org kan ada matlamat masing2, minat masing2, tujuan masing2... Org len mungkin rasa study ni memenatkan. Aku pun penat gak kadang2. Stressful. Tension2. Down. De-motivated. Tapi study ni besh. Rasa muda je sentiasa. Dah tu.. org tanya, kerja apa... Student. Owh... student. Muda lagi lar. Ahaihhhhh! Besh besh! Tapi aku mmg menten muda. Dan aku mmg impikan kerjaya di sekitar student-environment. Nak jadi cikgu tu idak ler, tp up sikit... lecturer, consultant, professor... InsyaAllah! Bersusah2 dahulu, bersenang2 kemudian. Niat yg penting... Aku mesti mahu menyumbang pada anak bangsa aku suatu masa nanti. Dan juga pada masyarakat sekitar aku. Terus rasa mudah segala kerja aku...

Occay, occay... tp bila aku dah mula jawab gitu, org tanya pulak.
Eena/Rose... dah tu bila nak kawen?

Haaaa, ni mmg soklan bonus. Makcik2, pakcik2, sedara-mare, kawan2 sekolah, kawan2 tak sekolah, errr... semua pon tanya soklan yg sama bila aku jawab aku masih single-single. Well, mmg soklan ni susah nak jawab. Dan jawapan typical aku... "bila ada jodoh, ada la.", " Sampai masa, kawin la aku.", "Kalau dah jodoh, esok pun aku leh kawen. Dah belom jodoh." , "Nak tolong carikan boypren utk aku ke?", dan sebagainya... jawapan tu semua aku dah wat collection masuk dalam tabung jawapan soklan2 past years. Agagagaga... But seriously, dah keje aku ngadap study je... mana nak cari boyfren. Budak2 baya aku, dah kawen, dah ada anak... aku akui. Paling2 tak pon, dah ada steady bf or tunang. Tapi come on lar... Bukan aku sorang je anak dara single dalam dunia ni okkayyyyy... Belum kiamat lagi ni woi. Tu, gi tanya nape Nasha Aziz yg cun tu tak kawin lagi? Eh, Ella pon lom kawin ke? Ke dah?

Tapi menariknya... ada kawan lama text aku aritu... ni sms dia;
"Tapi kan Rose... kena gak usaha. Takleh duk diam je".

Aku ngan rilek je jawab...
"Bukan tak usaha la, dah rakan2 sebaya kat sini banyak dah berpunya, dah kawin dah ada anak. Nak kena kejar ngan batang penyapu ke hape?"

Member lama aku... cuma leh tergelak.

Lagi... org tanya lagi...

Owh, belum sempat org tanya, aku dah smack down dulu.

BANYAK TANYA LAR!
Ingat soklan SPM ke. Dah, byk lagi keje aku nak wat nih. Agagagagagaaa...

Bila Eena membebel: Tanak bebel. Nak wat keje dulu nih.

More updates...

2009-05-27T12:30:00.010+10:00

Wuoh, its been awhile since I was last writing in here. Can't believe how busy my life have been lately. Everything seemed to be upside-down. Some said, this is normal and part of completing. So I take it positively and looking forward for June 30th, where everything are supposed to be clear by dat time. Tho results will only be released by mid-July, at least, I have submitted everything and just wait for the official result. Can't wait! Seriously... I'm exhausted. But still motivated and on the track... working on stuffs.

MySpace Countdown

And here I am... writing in the lib. Take 5. Trying to update what i've been up to lately. Not much. Pretty obvious I'd say as I dun have much pics to show. Schedule is really hectic. Dun even have time to grab my camera and snap pics around. Poor me.

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Weekend

Last Saturday, me and rumet went out as early as 930am, heading to Nicholson St-Kerr St. Earlier, we read this ads about massive SALE (up to 95%) at Empire Workshop (EW) and decided to go out early in the morning coz it's not far from our place. But, as we got there, we found out that nothing was interesting enuff at EW. Marketing strategy I guess. As what we've expected, only thongs and bras were really on SALE, 5dollars/piece. However, we were very fortunate that there were a couple of factory outlets nearby the place. And... taraaaaa, we've found a better SALE at another outlets. Damn! I was about to grab a pair of seriously-extremely-CHEAP Rockport shoes... not until I found that the back-lining was made of P.I.G-SKIN!!! Demit! 40% discount babe!!! And all of sudden, I felt sick. Agagagagaa... But seriously, it was really a massive SALE in that outlet. Everything was 40%-discounted. My rumet has bought herself 2 pairs of Teva sandals and if not bcoz of all-Rockport shoes have P.I.G-skin lining, we must have been buying more and more and more... *Tuhan nak selamatkan poket aku kuttttt, positive... positive.... fuhhhh*.

In the end, I just got myself 2 pieces of Reebok shirts. 10dollars/piece. Occayla. Dah nak merajuk ngan Rockport dah. Uuhuhuhuh...

Ohohohoh... wahai Kasut Rockport, mmg bukan rezeki aku ler. Dah lar aku mmg suka kaler merah tu! Dush dush! Sabar la wahai hati. Agagaga...

Pakai je lar kasut apa yg ada dulu occay...

Owh, sila jangan terpedaya. 1 bag je aku punya. 2 lagi tu... cik Su kita occay. Aku dah patah hati ngan Rockport tu. Teva I tak berapa minat.

The rest of the day? Sleep and working on my assignments.

On Sunday... when I was about to go to the library, I kinda saw the calendar and only then I realized it was already the 24th of May and I haven't buy anything for my mom's burfday. If I am about to get something from here, I need to get it fast coz it will take like a week to reach Msia via mail. And my mom's burfday will be on the 3rd of June, which will be very soon!

So, I've decided to go to the library, just dropping some books and soon after that, going to the VicMart to have a look and survey, what am i going to get for my mom. My rumet was curiously asking me, where am i about to go. So, I told her my plan and she was also interested to go to VicMart. Yeah, its been awhile since we were last going there. As far as I cud recall, the last time we went there were during the end of Summer, for the Nite Market.

Yup. So apalagi... round2 Vicmart. But nothing much. Seriously dunno what to get for my mom. I have bought her handbag, purse, shoes, ring... And this year, I just dunno what to give.

Owh, sempt lagi posing dpn VicMart. See, dah byk org jual scarf, beannie and stuffs coz skrg dah mula sejuk kat Melbourne. Tapi rege sama gak gitu, around AUD15/beannie. Nnt2 la baru rembat yang tiut2.

Dan... sempat gak curik2 amek pic ni. See, sian tak kitorang kat Melbourne ni. Nak makan manggis.. tu dia. Sila tgk regenya. 2biji manggis = 3 dollars (RM9). Kalau kat Msia, RM9 dapat sekilo? Dua kilo? Tiga kilo RM10? Haaa.. sila la bersyukur ye.

The hunting-journey continue to the DFO. But again, still no idea. Got home... frustrated and tired.

But soon after we reached home, Mazlee text me, asking me and Su for a coffee together *walaupun aku tak minum coffee*. And since me and Su already have tickets, occay je lar to hang out jap. So, me, Su, Akmal and Mazlee went for coffee *obviously, aku tak order coffee-based drinks lar, agagagagagaa*.

Aku, Akmal, Mazlee, Su. Opssss! Silap! Mango- , Ice-WhiteMocha, Hot Mocha, Iced-Choc. Arghh, tak tahu ler nama sebenar. Agagagaga.. Blasah je! Yang penting, air paling comey tu, eena yang minum. ROFL.

sempat lar posing2 dulu sementara tunggu mamat 2 eko tu nak sampai. Opsss~!

Akmal - Suraya - Mazlee. Nak berkenalan? Tapayah! Semua dah berpunya, dah nak kawen pon. Agagaggaa... habisla saham korang!

Wasn't stay for long coz everyone wanna go home - lotsaaa works waiting.

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Monday

Was planning to fast *puasa - lama rasanya tak puasa sunat. teruk betol! duh*. And I did *begitu jugak la si Mazlee and Akmal, sbb dah plan the nite before*... until I found out dat I cud not fast, just before I went to the lecture in the afternoon. Pancit di tghari. Adusss, sabo je la. Dugaan betul. Kalau tahu awal sikit, sempat gak grab lunch. So, I went to the lecture with hungry, empty tummy *tau2 je perut ni bila tak puasa, rajin lak dia lapar...*.

Got home apalagi. Memang sinsing lengan, ready turun dapur nak masak. And it was such a conincidence jerkkk.. my rumet text me and asking whether m going to having my break-fast *diorang mana tahu aku dah pancit, takleh pose* at home or elsewhere; and ofcoz lar at home - since I am no longer eating outside. She was asking coz Mazlee and Akmal wanna have a break-fast together. Memang rezeki korang ler... kalau aku dah masak time tu, takde nyer ler aku nak turun dapor 2 kali. Ni, cun2 je aku baru nak kuarkan ayam, korang dah text. Pandai betol! Bau sampai city ka? Agagagagga...

Dat nite, I cooked Ayam Masak Asam Pedas, Buncis Goreng Telor, Telur Mata Kerbau with lime juice and chillies... dan tidak dilupakan, Cekodok Pisang. And betapa hampehnya... oleh kerana masing2 kebuluran, satu pic pun lupa nak hamekkk! Bukan selalu masak Ayam masam asam pedas tu. Adoyaiii. Lapar nyer pasal. Mmg mak mertua lalu pon tak hengat. Opssss sapa yg dah ada mak mertua? Betul ke camtu? Aku takde gikk.. Aagaggagaga.

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Tuesday

Wuoh. Back to hectic schedule. I have to compelete brush up my analysis chapter. It was not really good and I need to put more stuffs into it. And am going to submit a new draft to Juliet by tis Saturday.

At the same time, I need to submit two 5000words essay on the June 9th. And Gosh!!! I havent started anything on any of those... YET! Panic, panic!

Ended up... I stayed in the library the whole day, from the morning sampai lar kena halau ngan org kat library - owh bukan kena halau tu occay, kena halau sbb library dah nak tutup. Agagagagaga...

Thanks to rumet sbb masak. Actually, saje je bagi u masak sekali-skala.. Dapat manja2 sikit. Hiksss. And not bad, she cooked sambal tumis telur and crispy fried chicken. Kenyang lerrr perutku yg tidak berisi the whole day. Cayalahhh rumet. Bila nak buat masak lemak lak??? Tungguuuuuuu.

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Wednesday

And today? Mana ada hapdet lagi... Wednesday tak habis lagi. And am still in the library. I think I have spent enuff time updating this poor blog. I better get back to my work. Duh! Will update more later.

Zasssssssssssssssssssssss!

Bila Eena membebel: Yesh yesh! Dah tau nak bagi apa kat mama on her bufday. Harap2 dia suka la... ;)

Beautiful Friday... yet hectic life continues.

2009-05-22T21:27:00.007+10:00

Despite a busy and hectic schedule I have... still, I wanna enjoy my life to the optimum. I try my best to do all I can. I knw I shud be spending some time off from academia... yeah, some times. And since I'm going to leave Melbourne soon after completing my study this July, I really need to explore more places (at least in Melbourne) before leaving for good. But due to heavy workload I have at the moment, my time is extremely limited to enjoy life.

For the time being, my enjoyment much focus on doing my hobby - cooking, snap pics around and jogging. As I have been telling earlier, I have started campaign to eat only home-cooked meals (and tis doesn't mean you guys cannot invite me for lunch or dinner - as long as you guys cook, and NOT going to restaurants and stuffs like dat). So, I've tried quite a number of menu and it's pretty obvious I guess, if my floormates say dat they often see me in the kitchen. lol.

-----

Eating Home-Cooked Meals Campaign still ON.

For today, I combine Thai and Malay taste *as you may already know, I am half Thai (mom) and half Malay (Dad)*. So, I am very much influenced by these two traditions; Eastern Thai (coz my mom's from Chiangmai) and Muar, Johor (dats where my dad originally from). If you guys go to Eastern Thai, you'll find that most of them prefer to eat sticky rice instead of normal rice. And in fact, it is much much easier for you to find sticky rice (they call it, Khow Neuw), and you can eat it with grilled/fried chicken or fried eggs; especially when you go for picnic, u may see there are many small shoplots selling sticky rice with somtam, another special Eastern Thai food.

As for lunch today, I cooked sticky rice with special Thai Style Fried, Scrambled-Egg (telur goreng kicap) and Malay-style Crispy Fried Fish and Sambal Tumis Ikan Bilis. Yummy! Serius sedap, tak tipu punya. Agagagaga... Tis really reminds me of my bro, Bobon coz he really is a big fan of sticky rice. Cudnt imagine his face if he'd knw I cook sticky rice and not inviting him along. Agagagaga... miss you bro!

And as usual, rumet keeps complaining... "Duh, cmana nak diet ini macam". Agagaga... lupakan je la rumet oit. Nanti I dah balek Msia, u diet lar. Sapa nak masak lagi menu2 gini.

-----

Academia

Hurmh. Loads to say. But it' s going to be extremely boring for you guys to read. Most of it will be around my tireness and messed-up mind about what to prioritize and what to do less, coz it seems everything need my fullest attention at the moment. And, as usual... I am trying to do my very best. Of course, to get a place at a good uni for my Ph.D. studies later and to do research in relates to my interest. I'm going to screw it all if I dunot perform; especially in the thesis part. It will be like an extra credit in my resume if I cud publish a great thesis. And for that, I really need to work very very very hard. I really dun wanna mess up my future for being lazy now and cost me my future career.

InsyaAllah. I can do tis! I knw I can.

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An evening @Carlton Garden

Usually, I like to spend my evening to jog around Carlton Garden. But upon my rumet's special request, we spent our evening for a special autumn photoshoot tis evening. We were very fortunate as the weather was really good today and the garden looks awesome-ly beautiful. Very suitable to snap pics around. And of coz... the camera always loves the girls *agagagagaga... bukan girls love camera je occay. dah memang camera pun suka ngan kitorang. tak boleh blahhhh*. But seriously, I was really satisfied with the outcome. Lottsaaa beautiful photos.

Plus, it is a good past time activity. Simply walk around and, get some rest from books and academia for awhile.

So rumet, where's out next location? Agagagaggaaaa...

-----

Special dessert for dinner

I have cooked extra sticky rice and the meals so I dun have to cook for dinner. But I feel like wanna make some dessert. Special dessert. So, I glance thru my drawer and see what cud I make... and tara!!!! This was it.

I've made special Bread Pudding with Mapple Syrup (as topping). Ahahahaa, and I knw my rumet cannot resist it. And wat made me happy was... I gave out some to my floormates *coz masa nak amek kuar dr oven tu, bebudak tu semua duk shout Wowww, what's dat* and they gave a big applause -with special comment "Selalu nampak u masak menarek2 and now only we cud try your cook" *bergema la gak floor ni dibuatnya and opkos rasa kemaluan... erkkk rasa malu dehhh, agagagagaga tak boleh blah!*

Occayla tu! Sempoi jer. And yummy~

Next time buat laen lak ;)

For now?
Apalagi.... study lerrrr!!! Zassssssssssss....

Bila Eena membebel: Woah, cpt betol la masa berlalu. Dari weekend bertemu another weekend lagi. Adoyaiii... tetiba rasa sesak napasss... i need CPR!

NO outside/fast food campaign begins...

2009-05-21T23:06:00.007+10:00

Yerp. I have agreed (at least to myself). I will only eat home-cooked meals and no more visiting any restaurants, until completing tis semester. First, bcoz I want to spend more time at home - focus on my study. Second, dun wanna waste my money for outside food. Yelah, just imagine.. say if I go to KFC, 1 meal often costs me around 9 to 10 dollars. But, if I cooked by myself... much much worthy kot!! 1kg chicken only cost me like 4 dollars. Makan la puas2 pun kan. Agagagaga... And, in fact, I am more satisfied with my own cook *even bukan la tahap chef2 restaurant pon kan*. At least I can eat all I want, lantak byk mana pon and nak rasa cmana.

And as the beginning... last nite, we had Get-Together-Dinner at my place. Me and Su organized the dinner and invited some closed-friends to join us - Sharifah, Aliyah, Nazrul, Akmal and Mazlee. Sempoi je pun menu nya. I just cooked Ayam Bistik and Nasi Impit. Also, I made Onde-Onde *some call it Buah Melaka - tp nape nama dia buah melaka?*. Occayla, buat ilang kempunan kawan2 perantau kan.

Sharifah pulak... was very kind, bought a box of Krispy Kreme Doughnuts for us. Thanks lar Sharifah for the dessert. Kan besh masak2 n makan ramai2. Lebey jimat. Takyah masak susah2 pon. Much much worth for $$$ than eating outside. Kenyang pun kenyang. BTW, thanks gang for coming.

And since we had *eating* too much last nite, today I just cooked simple menu. We had Nasi Impit *ada lagi baki beberapa peket* with Masak Lemak Telur+Ikan Masin. Also, I made cucur ikan bilis untuk kunyah2 sambil study. Hiks.

-----

Today... was nothing much. I had lecture in the evening. I was supposed tentavily canceled yesterday but at the very last minutes, Prof Leslie said the class was still one. Luckily my apartment is just 5 minutes away from the uni. Agagagaga.. And, as expected, not many were turned up during the lecture. Less than 15 students, if I was not wrong. Yang pasti, my BF yang iras2 Superman tu datang. Adusssss... seb bek dia duk row belakang. Agagaga... tak boleh blah!

The rest of the day? *selaen daripada aktiviti makan, agagagagagaaa*

... just working on my essay. Collecting materials and researching for relevant references. Duhhh... I have 5,000+5,000+5,000+12,000words to do *before completing my study*. Tuhan, give me enuff strength to complete all these. Sikit je lagi... kena kuat!

Hurmhh... talking about being strong and focus, I kinda remember something which had happened last week, when I was extremely down and lost my motivation. Someone has said;

Awak rasa down, awak rasa lemah, awak rasa teruk, awak rasa kecewa... dan berulang2 awak kata tak yakin.
Awak kata pada siapa? Pada diri awak kan?
Sapa yang menjatuhkan awak... diri awak.
Sapa yang mencampak awak ke dalam kegelapan?
Bukankah diri awak sendiri?

Tho I wasn't really listen to it the moment I got the msg... it remained in my memory til now. And somehow, I agree with it. In fact, I can say.. I totally agree with it.

There is no point to give up at this stage. I am almost reaching the finishing line. I have been strong for more than one and a half years. And... I only need to be strong for another one and a half months.

And, I'd like to express my gratitude and million thanks to everyone... who have been supporting me for so long. Only Allah knows who you are to me. And, only Allah wud pay you guys, for all your kindness and non-stop encouragements.

InsyaAllah...
I wont let you guys upset.
I'll make you guys proud for being my parent, my brothers and my sister, my friends.
I'll prove you wrong... *this goes to those who ever looked me (& my family) down*.

Thanks everyone!
for the encouragements and supports

also,
for the critics.

-----

Owh. Just two more short notes here.

First... Ive forgotten to update about tis. I've received another bouquet of flowers *few days ago*. ;) *rumet dah siap wat stetmen... "kawen je lar eena... asek dapat munga jerk". Erkk, apakah?? agagagagaa*.

Second, I wanna intro you guys with my new baby, Miko *nama manja yang diberi*. I got Miko from the post office few days ago. Nampak je Miko terus rasa tiut n rembat. Plus, it was really cheap. It was only 8dollars, first hand good quality. Kalau kat Malaysia??? Mahu gak RM50++ I think. Besh besh, bertambah koleksi.

Occay la. Dats all for today I guess. Sleepyhead. I better off to bed now. Nite.

Bila Eena membebel: My youngest bro baru text tadi. Ngadu my mom majukss ngan my dad. Hanya sebab sorang dah conquer tgk Hindustan, sorang nak tgk cenel laen. Hahaha... dr dulu sampai skrg. Itu la papa n mama. Rindu dah mula terasa...

Ohhh... Cinta untuk Ain!

2009-05-20T11:39:00.005+10:00

It's finally over... with an expected ending. Farid and Kamal got what they deserved, being imprisoned for what they've done. Not much on dat, except when Ain, Syamin and Ako kantoikan Farid and a scene at the jail, when Ain visiting Kamal. The rest of the story was about how Syamin talks to her family, Ain talks to Zarita-poyo and... of course the happy ending story between Ain and Syarol. Haihla.. selebet rasa si Syarol (Que) in the final episode last nite. I'd say it was an easy ending. Quite fast in fact. And I think there must be lottssaaaaa ads if you watch it on TV, I duno coz I just stream it over the net. Thanks TV3 for the drama. 13 wonderful episodes. Am going to mish Que Haidar much much much... erk! Apakah? Agagagagaaa... *takpe, tau... ramai yg jeles. takpela, setia ku pada Hans Isaac. At least, dia bujang lagik... agagagaga!*

And with the ending of Cinta Untuk Ain, what am I going to watch after tis? Criminal Minds pun dah nak habis very soon! Duhhhhh lar. Maybe rumet was right. It's time to focus on the completion of the study.

Occay, occay! Eena, back to the academia! Focus and aiming to reach the final line.

Woah... see the deadlines;

Corruption: 9 June Justice, Democracy and Difference: 9 June Managing Media and Communication: 15 June Full thesis submission: 30 June

Chaiyookkkk Chaiyookkk!!! You can do it.

Bila Eena membebel: Buku2 masih berlambak utk dibaca, malah kena tambah lagi tu. Kena tingkatkan lagi rajin biar setinggi and melampaui byknya buku yang perlu dibaca. Bole ka Eena?

It's Wednesday!

2009-05-19T22:20:00.006+10:00

It's nearly end of May... and soon will be June! Woah, time really went so fast! It feels sooo yesterday when I was panicking to see the calendar changed into May. And now... only a couple more days, will be June already. Seriously. I must be dreaming! No No No... Even if I slap my face hundred times, this fact wont change. Never.

So, I better step on the real ground.

Today was seriously disastrous for me. I had a chronic tummy prob. Wat's the case?

The story began with...

Yeah, I had meeting with my supervisor, Juliet yesterday. As you may already knw (read the previous entry if you DONT :P), I was extremely nervous to get feedback from Juliet, regarding the draft I've sent her earlier *coz I think that was really a crap!!!*.

But as usual *berkat doa tak putus2 dan juga semangat dari kawan2- thanks guys!*...

... everything turned out extremely well and Juliet was soooooo positively encouraging and gave me good comments and feedbacks.

it's perhaps bcoz I didn't see Juliet for 3 weeks... and I thought it was bcoz of my crap-draft. What was the best part out of our meeting yesterday?

Of coz the conversation we had in the beginning of the meeting;

Juliet: Occay, u were saying dat u're panicking. Tell me 'bout it.
Rose: Yeah, of coz am panicking. I have one month left and I havent even complete a full draft. With additional subjects' tasks some more *and I cud feel an instant effect of major adrenaline pumping*.
Juliet: Don't panick. You have plenty of time to finish this. One and a half month in fact.
Rose: Well, I cudnt stop myself from panicking whenever I think about this.
Juliet: Dun worry. Panicking is part of the finishing stage. And.. hang on. Dun u see... here is an almost completed thesis you have. Don't stress * and only God knws how much I love Juliet for this!*

She just swiped away all my stress and inconfidence... just in a flash. And am all MOTIVATED and be strong again!

So... why was this relevant to the problem I had today?

And before dat... as I said earlier the day before, I was about to cook Chicken rice. So rite after the meeting, got home, cook... and yeah, I enjoyed eating Chicken Rice *bykkk gak aku pulun nasi ayam smalam, hati senang katakan...*.

But bcoz I was soo excited with the outcome of the meeting I had with Juliet, I was thinking of celebrating. Was thinking about watching movie yesterday. But when I checked thru all the now showing movies... fuhhh, vry frustrating. None of them seemed interesting to me. Some of my colleagues strongly suggest Angel&Demon, but nahhhh dats seriously not my type of movie. Then the rest? Xmen ler *lagi la akak tak berkenan! makhluk kaler2 tu*, Bob the Builder ler, Star Trek ler.. adusshhh serious tak boleh blahhh!!!

And I text-ed my rumet *coz she wasnt home yet dat time* - saying dat I really need entertainment. Like seriously need it. It was maghrib already and even if I wanna do window shopping also... not possible. All major shopping complexes close at 5pm.

Nak dipendekkan citer lar kan...

When my rumet reached home... I was again complaining dat I really to get myself out of this room *yelah, asek bertapa ngadap kejeeeee je, stress dollll..* and all of sudden, I asked her to chill out at San Churro @LygonSt. Seb bek my rumet sporting. Tho she was just finished having the chicken rice I cooked, we still went out.

But on our way to Lygon St., we were kind of talking dat... maybe we cud try something else instead of Churro. And without any plan, we went to MyCube (MC) *plus, rumet tak penah gi sana, cun sangat la kan!*.

And...... dat was where I got this problem.

WARNING: Please be informed dat am not saying dat the food was bad NOR to discourage you guys to go there. Please read the actual fact and avoid such order. That would be more helpful. Am not responsible for any MC loss occay.

Since I was still full with chicken rice... I was thinking of having something light and just something I cud bite and enjoy out of the cold weather. So I ordered fishball kue teow soup. Yang rumet lak, I suggested her Assam Laksa. Takkan nak order yang sama, kan. When they took the order, they were asking whether we want it to be spicy or not. And ofcoz lar kan... tekak melayu. Sibuk order pedas. And lebey gatal lagi... sebut "extra-spicy please...".

Memang extra-spice la dia bagi... Adoyai bai! Cari penyakit betol!

And since then...

my tummy mula meragam! At first, I thought it was bcoz my tummy was extremely overloaded with foods. But it turned to be more serious thruout the nite.

I started sakit perut ulang2 ke tandas and nauseated.

And it turned even worst... as I cudnt sleep the whole nite!

Not even after I jogged in the morning.

And when the clock already showed 10am, and I felt like I cudnt sleep anymore... I just got myself ready and go to the uni. Studying.

Duhhhh la. Itu pun takleh concentrate. Coz perut meragam. Badan penat coz didnt sleep whole nite.

So after sometime, I went back home je larrr...

But before got home, sempat gak lari ke city to buy stuffs sambil snap2 pics.

Love Autumn! Simply beautiful! And... also bcoz I like to take photos. I hope... I cud spend some time to snap pics around Melbourne before leaving home for good. But... bilakah??? Yang pastinya, after all submissions lar! Hiksss...

Some of you might've been asking me... what am i doing if couldnt sleep at nite? *of coz la selain daripada reading yg berlambak tu kan*...

Well... FYI, am a serious lappy/pc addict. I cud spend hours in front my lappy coz I can do many things by simply using my lappy *and ofcoz with the internet connection some more*, and I hardly get boring with it.

Just like last nite... when I cudnt study but yet cannot sleep *gara2 perut yg teruk meragam*

I played latest version of DinerDash (Flo Through Time) sampai complete habis semua dah. Agagaggaa...

Also... I like watching movies and TV shows; either downloading it or streaming over the net. And there're several shows am really into it and follow every week - including the Criminal Minds (download), Cinta Untuk Ain (streaming TV3), CSINY (download), and Akademi Fantasia (via YT).

But sadly... AF already over last week. Hafiz dah menang pon. I dun wanna talk about the final. It was seriously boring!!! Not really up to the standard of final performance. And tonite, Cinta untuk Ain lak dah episod akhir... Duh laaa... Am waiting for the upload. Tak sabar dolllll nak tengok!!! But at the same time, duhhh berkurang la bahan utk layan pasnih.. agagagaga. Bak kata rumet, "Apalagi... time to study laaaar!". Cheh, rumet.. cakap hebat! Dua kali lima ada la... Agagagaga.

Occay la guys. Jom tunggu Cinta untuk Ain!!! Yabeedaaaabeddooooo!!! *harap2 diorang cepat2la upload. aminnnn. Agagaga... takleh blahhh.*

And wahai perot, cepatla sembuh yer.

Esok kan nak makan2 lagi... Opsss! Am I missing anything here?

Yups.

Am planning to invite some friends for a get-together-dinner tomorrow. Menu apa? Rahsia la dulu yerkkk. Ada la... simple2 je. Yang penting... ada main coarse meal and dessert. InsyaAllah. And sorry for those yang duk jauh2, bukan saja tanak jemput or saja2 wat during the weekday. But am seriously not available on most of the weekends.

For more stories... just wait and see. Surely will snap photos and tell ya about the dinner.

But for now... nak refresh2 webbie TV3. Sampai ada... kalau tak tido pun nak click refresh gakssss!! Tak kira, tak kira! Agagagagaggaaa...

Zassssssssssssss!!! Cau-sin-ci.

Bila Eena membebel: Yeshhhh!! Diorang dah haplod... Jom tgkk!! Zassssssssss! SILA JANGAN KACO

Grrrr.....

2009-05-18T14:03:00.003+10:00

Woohooo, I'll have a meeting with my supervisor this afternoon *again, kena cabut awal dr lecture Prof Robyn*. And for the hundredth times, I feel extremely nervous..! It is even more serious than the feel I had when I was in love. Mana idaknya... bangun tido terus ngadap keje, *gosok gigi pun idak, mandi pun idak, makan pun idak* prepare for tonnes of questions from Juliet, and.. lebey menakutkan, I need to get ready if she'd turn to a scarily hungry tiger. Uhuhuhuhu...

Doa byk2 Juliet tak bising2 sgt... ngeriiiii dolll!!!!

Occay! Need to go to the lecture! If only I could skip this lecture. Fuhhh!!!
No No No... this will be the second last lecture before the exam period begins...

What??? Second last lecture??? Lagi ngeri dolllllllllllll!!!!!

Arghhhh!!!

Zassssssssssssssss.... cabut!

Bila Eena membebel: Uishhh ada berani mau bebel lagi... kalau Juliet bebel cmana??? Owhhh tidakkkkkk!!! Mengerikan! Mau menanah telinga dengar! Nauzubillah!!

in mood vs. laziness

2009-05-17T23:38:00.005+10:00

In the mood of 'Kuih Keria'
(buat Kuih Keria, makan Kuih Keria, jamu kawan2 makan Kuih Keria)

after I made Kuih Keria and invite some friends the other day... my rumet also being influenced into making kuih keria the next day *puas la makan kuih keria... sampai masing2 sesak dada. Agagaggaga*

But me? Wuoh... I started to be lazy to cook.

so I just ate Kuih Keria cik Suraya have made.

When I am in the mood of cooking...

so I cooked Assam Pedas Fish (yelah, I've bought a kg of fish few days ago, was planning to make laksa... tp nampaknya, selamat jadi Assam Pedas Fish je dulu, agagaga).

But when I started to b lazy again...

Simply cook Sayur Goreng Ikan Masin and Crispy fried chicken is already enuff.

But sometimes, its really hard to tell and all of sudden and I am again in the mood of cooking.

So I cooked Chicken Curry (siap ngan telur dadar lagi).

Sometimes, it's not like... today I am in the mood and tomorrow is changed to laziness.

Just like today...

Wasnt sleep the whole nite last nite (working on my thesis) and seriously feels like soooo lazy to cook for lunch (tho my tummy sings like a whole playlist with hundreds of songs already, agagaga)... So I just cooked Black Pepper Chicken (recipe sempoi) for lunch *alamekkkk dah sental habis, lupa nak snap pic*.

But all of sudden, in the evening... I feel like wanna make some dessert. And again, I make Kuih Rengas (thanks to bonda cik Suraya kita, yang akhirnya bagi nama pada kuih kacang yang aku reti buat, tapi tak tau nama, agagaaggaga). And taraa... terus siap!

IMPORTANT NOTE: Perghh... dah macam koleksi resipi lak. No No No... this blog is remained to be a personal blog rather than an online recipe webbie.

BTW, It's simply the same as my mood in studying...

Sometimes, I can finish my work just in a flash when I am seriously in the mood.
But when am not really in the mood.... haaahh tu dia, satu sentence pun payah nak bikin!

Duhhhh... but I cannot simply rely on the presence of mood yang macam 'biskut' tu. Sat ada, sat takde. Keje bertimbun2, mood nyer manjang nyorok la, ilang la, sesat la.. Gawat sihhh!!!

Panicking!!!!

FOOTNOTE: BTW rumet... lupakan la hasrat nak diet tu. Esok I masak Nasi Ayam ok?? Agagaga...

Bila Eena membebel: Hafiz dah jadi pun berjaya dinobatkan jadi Juara AF7... aku lak bila nak jadi juara? Juara tido? Jom gi tido! Agagagagaga...

I'm running outta time..

2009-05-16T12:19:00.004+10:00

In less than 12 hours, there will be the grand finale of Akademi Fantasia for this season...
In about 3 days, we will see how's Cinta untuk Ain will ends...
In 2 weeks time, Criminal Minds and CSINY for this season will also end..

BUT... dat doesn't really matter.

In fact, I have to worry about...

2 projects which I need to complete in 2 weeks time (and I hardly touch any of them)
1 detailed-report to be submitted in a month time,

and at the same time...

the most important piece of my master's dissertation (still struggling...sigh!)

Seriously... I wish I cud have more time for all these!

But I really need to accomplish tis 'mission' in a MONTH-time!

Bila Eena membebel: Still in the library... working on my thesis.

In the pursuit of love...

2009-05-14T14:48:00.005+10:00

While am in the middle of reading (for the purpose of improving my dissertation's collection of past literature around love and sexual desire), I found this...

*just feels like wanna share tis piece of Andreas Capellanus (1991) work on the Philosophy of Love with you guys*

the rules of loves
marriage is no real excuse for not loving
he who is not jealous cannot love
no one can be bound by a double love
it is well known that love is always increasing or decreasing
that which a lover takes against the will of his beloved has no relish
boys do not love until they arrive at the age of maturity
when one lovers dies, a widowhood of two years is required of the survivor
no one should deprived of love without the very best of reasons
no one can love unless he is impelled by the persuasion of love
love is always a stranger in the home of avarice
it is not proper to love any women whom one would be ashamed to seek to marry
a true lover does not desire to embrace in love anyone except his beloved
when made public love rarely endures
the easy attainmen of love makes it of little value; difficulty of attainment makes it prized
every lover regularly turns plae in the presence of his beloved
when a lover suddenly catches sight of his beloved his heart palpitates
a new love puts to flight an old one
good character alone makes any man worthy of love
if love diminishes, it quickly fails and rarely revives
a man in love is always apprehensive
real jealousy always increases the feeling of love
jealousy, and therefore love, are increased when one suspects his beloved
he whom the thought of love vexes eats and sleeps very little
every act of a lover ends in the thought of his beloved
a true lover considers nothing good except what he thinks will please his beloved
love can deny nothing to love
a lover can never have enough of the solaces of his beloved
a slight presumption causes a lover to suspect his beloved
a man who is vexed by too much passion usually does not love
a true lover is constantly and without intermission possessed by the thought of his beloved
nothing forbids one woman being loved by two men or one man by two women

For those who're in love...
have u followed all these rules (or really experience all those stuffs; jealousy, non-betrayal, definite decision; etc etc)?
how true the set of rules above tell about your love life?
do you think your so-called true love is really a true love?

and...

do you agree with these rules?

Tepuk dada tanya selera... Only you know yourself best.

Dalam Episod 12, siri Cinta untuk Ain;

"... saya takkan berhenti cintakan awak, Ain. Takkan berhenti."
Itu dialog Sharol yang betul2 tembak direct ke ulu hati aku... duhhh!
*Tak boleh blahhh!*

Note: FYI, am not Master in Love nor a love counselor. My research is built upon the issues of complex loves, and in particularly doctor-patient romance. The theoretical and philosophical ground which strengthen the discussion of so-called 'forbidden loves' are largely based on the past literature on the philosophy of love, sexual desire, individual self and autonomy, agency and structure, choices and social constraint, bla bla bla... But to be honest, the more I research about love, I am actually lost about... what is true love? does it really exist in this whole world? how do you tell it is 'the one' or the real 'mr.right'?

Bila Eena membebel: Yang pasti... aku rasa cinta Sharol utk Ain dalam Cinta untuk Ain tu, mmg cinta sejati. Sayangnya dalam drama je la. In real world? Mana nak cari org yang macam Sharol (spt yang dilakonkan of Que Haidar) tu? Kalau ada yg mcm tu... alangkah.... tapi bak kata rumet, "Berenti berangannnn...". Agagagagaga... "Yelah rumet..."

Demi kerana... Cinta untuk Ain

2009-05-13T18:24:00.003+10:00

Haha, supposedly... as usual, its time for me to watch Cinta Untuk Ain by Wednesday 12 oclock in the morning. Coz biasanya, by 12midnite kat sini (Melben), mmg dah up la utk aku click and play... ahaks.

But last nite.. it doesnt work dat way. Latest eppie is yet being uploaded by TV3.

Tunggu lagi...

lagi...

dan lagi...

yang bertambah is only the number of frustrated-sound shoutouts kat webbie tu.

dan bertambah...

lagi...

dan lagi...

*dahsyat gak aku ni.. turut sama2 tak sudah2 meng-refresh the page berulang kali dgn gigihnya*

But still hampa...

end up... keje aku is to copy paste these selected shoutouts yg ada kat webbie tu. Everyone is like... seriously frustrated waiting every single sec to watch the latest eppie.

PERHATIAN: Aku bukan nak anjurkan mogok ke hape occay. Just copy(o) and paste(tomyam) je... sambil tunggu bila la TV3 nak upload eppie terbaru Cinta Untuk Ain. Duh!

~nape xde lagi episode 12 ni tv3 pls do something!!!!!!
~laaaaa..... xdak lagi ker episod 12.lembat betul dah nak masuk t/hari nie bro.cepat ler sikit.selamat ulang tahun ke 25 tv3 <--- see, sampai tghari dia tunggu.. sian kan.. hikss
~mana ni episod 12, nk tgk ni...pas tu len kali x yah la loading lambt ssagt..jenuh nunggu.... <--- ishh jgn ckp camtu... betul2 dai tak loading, cmana.. dusss
~MANER EP 12??????????????????? APASAL LEMBAB SGT TV3 NIE.. <--- haa, marah dah tu. siap all caps lock dah tu. Aiyok TV3 ... tak tau...
~Ishhh...mane episod 12 nie.....tak de pun....... <--- mmg blum ada lagipun..
~knpe lambat sangt nie!!!!!! bnci btul..eeeeeeeeee lembap!!!!!!!!!
~mana nie episod 12, lembap betul lah .
~di mana episod 12???cpt la tv3...ape lombap bona nie... <--- biso bonar...
~mana ep 12.tak sabaq nak tengok .tv3...oh..tv3..janganlah seksa jiwa ku...tolonglah dengarlah rayuanku. <--- tu dia.. Cinta Untuk Ain nyer pasal.. menyeksa jiwa katanyaaaa....
~mane episode 12 ni??? anak tgh tido nie la masanyer nk tgk..tv3 please...... <--- see, see... mak budak pun sanggup tu lenakan anak demi nak layan Cinta Untuk Ain
~apsal epsod 12,xda lg ni..lambatnya bahhhhh.....aku mo tngok sangt yang c ain mara kat faridni....ih geramnyaaaaaaaa.tv3, pleaselah <--- sabo sabo..
~ak mo tgkbah epsod 12 niee,nnt anak aku bangun xsyok arrr tgk critatu coz anak asik kacau jak...tv3..cepatlah <--- lagi satu... sabo kak oi.. sabo.. hiks
~xdela lg? eh knp xde lg ni? ble nk ade nye? tahun dpn ker?? lembab ah, korg tdo ker! klu xde gak bek korg xyah show cite ni laa,hmm! <--- uish ada ka tahun depan
~lembap nk mmpos..dr smlm aku refresh x kua2...aku da x sbr da nih...tgk kt ikln mcm best je episod neh..lalala
~lembab nya!!!! dr smlm sei aku tgg...!!!!
~cepatla episod 12 x sabar ni nk tgok farid kena ngn ain <--- uishhh, aku nak engok Ain n Sharol (tp sbnnya lebey kepada Sharol la kan, agagagaga)
~kenapa ep 12 lmbt nk upload......dari pagi saya tunggu.....suami saya pn bising psl diapn tunggu nk tengok......tv3 cpt lh .....plsssssssssssss <--- bukan setakat ibu2, laki bini pun haa.. hebat penangan Cinta Untuk Ain ni...
~1 hari tgh tunggu ni..sabar ja lah jawapannya.<--- see, menghitung hari lagi..
~mana episod mlm td ni selalu tv 3 xlembap cm ni
~apehal lahhh lambat sangat niiiii.
~eh asl xde lagi ni, isk benci ah org dah excited nk tgk spoil mood org jelaa, hm.. tv3 lembabbbbbbbb!!!!

And shoutout pilihan aku adalah...

jeng jeng jeng...

tv3 sbb ko lambat sila upload dgn ep 13 trusss...ada berani ka?? - anonymous

setuju setuju setuju! *sambil angkat kedua2 tangan n kaki, poster, banner, sepanduk, bunting, bla bla bla... erkkk!!! apakahhh!*

But...

jangan la kut. Mmg la diorang berani wat.. upload 2 episodes but next week! Arghhh!! No No No... *turun balik kaki n tangan. agagagagaga*

Bila Eena membebel: Owh Cinta Untuk Ain....

I love my family... dat wud ALWAYS comes first.

2009-05-13T10:22:00.003+10:00

no matter how rich other families are..

no matter how happy others wud tell me about their lives..

regardless of all who shared with me about how passionate they are about their mate and their intent to get married (or watsoever)...

of all the loneliness i've heard for being apart from their beloved ones...

despite all hardworking you do just for your beloved one (kumpul duit bagai nak rak utk shopping ngan awek/bf, jalan2 or holiday with frens, spend thousand hours just to pamper your fiancee, etc etc)...

one thing for sure...

I really miss my mum, my dad, my siblings...

I hope I am there with them rite at tis sec (if i cud)...

I wish I cud spend every cents I have to help my singlings to achieve their dreams...

I wish to pay everything my mum n dad have to so dat they cud just rest and spend their time at home

and...

for giving you both a grandchild (insyaAllah one day).

No one cud ever win my heart tis much!

I LOVE you mama, papa, and adik2 semua!

Papa... please take care of your health conditions. Dun be stubborn anymore - drink sweet cordials and visiting kedai mamak every morning.

Mama... sabar la. Along kan pulang dan ubah keadaan family kita. I wont let u suffer even a sec.. no more.

Adi... as the eldest bro, you shud menten a good role model. Family shud always be your priority.

Afi... sama2 kite bekerja keras. But never neglect your ownself - jaga makan and rehat.

Bobon... along sayang kamu. Jangan terlalu diturut hati muda mu. Tekadkan hati n bykkan bersabar. Kelak masa depanmu kan gemilang.

Ayub... kesabaran mu mmg terserlah. Jasa mu pada keluarga takkan along lupakan. Sangat bernilai.

Iki... apa pun jalan yang kamu pilih, jangan lupa jaga diri dan nama baik kelurga.

Aying... I love you so much sista. I'm very proud of you. Let us together reach the sky.

And my beloved lil bro, Tuyui... along sanggup buat apa saja utk tgk masa depan kamu cerah. Eventho I have to sacrifice all I have..

My beloved family...

I dun care about our past difficulties and all those hard times

I dun care how small our house is

I dun care which direction you may go, my bros and sis

All i need you guys to knw is just...

I REALLY CARE!

... and let us be one and look towards the future.

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

Mou hitori de arukenai

Toki no kaze ga tsuyosugite
Ah kizu tsuku koto nante
Nareta hazu dakedo ima wa...

Ah kono mama dakishimete
Nureta mama no kokoro wo
Kawari tsuzukeru kono toki ni
Kawaranai ai ga aru nara

Will you hold my heart
Namida uketomete
Mou kowaresou na All my heart

Forever love Forever dream
Afureru omoi dake ga
Hageshiku setsunaku jikan wo umetsukusu
Oh tell me why

All I see is blue in my heart

Will you stay with me
Kaze ga sugisaru made
Mata afuredasu All my tears

Forever love Forever dream
Kono mama soba ni ite
Yoake ni furueru kokoro wo dakishimete
Oh stay with me

Ah subete ga owareba ii
Owari no nai kono yoru ni
Ah ushinau mono nante
Nanimo nai anata dake

Forever love Forever dream
Kono mama soba ni ite
Yoake ni furueru kokoro wo dakishimete

Ah will you stay with me
Kaze ga sugisaru made
Mou dare yori mo soba ni

Forever love Forever dream
Kore ijou arukenai
Oh tell me why Oh tell me true
Oshiete ikiru imi wo

Forever love Forever dream
Afureru namida no naka
Kagayaku kisetsu ga eien ni kawaru made
Forever love

Bila Eena membebel: InsyaAllah, berkat doa kalian, aku akan habis pengajian on time and kembali ke tanahair... BTW, brapa byk dari kite yg sentiasa utamakan keluarga dalam segala hal? Adakah terkadang kita terlalu alpa ngan keindahan dunia dan org di sekitar kita sedangkan yang paling dekat adalah darah yang mengalir dalam tubuh kita...

Tuesday's over... and here comes the Wednesday.

2009-05-13T00:46:00.007+10:00

wont write much today. hope the pics worth to tell you guys what i was up to yesterday.

woke up early. had a walk around. didnt feel like jog. but still wanted to walk around.

got home. shower. and ready to go out. lotsaa to do.

first, me and my rumet went to the unimelb...

to activate my new debit.mastercard @commonwealth in the uni, and

to send stuffs i have sold via ebay *tis is kinda my passion lately. into e-business. bole la sikit2 tu*

then we went to footscray market. to get some grocery. plan to cook laksa sometimes soon. but cudnt find torch ginger (bunga kantan), dried assam (asam keping) and the laksa itself. Haih, dunno la... mayb the fish(es) i bought wud turn to something else before i cud really make laksa. haha.

n o p i c t u r e

owh, other than shop for groceries... i was also accompanying my rumet to trim her hair at one of this viatnamese salon at footscray, a couple doors away from the market itself. cheap. only 10dollars to trim. but coz there were mis-comm here and there *they speak poor english, i mean... very poor!*, we hardly get what we really wanted and expected. so, 10dollars for undesirable outcome is better or 40dollars of marvellous and fully-satisfied outcome is preferred?

from footscray, we took a train back to the city. stopped by for a massage *dah plan brapa hari dah pun kan...* and both of us went for a neck, shoulder and back massage package. Was a great relief. and i wish to have a fullbody massage.. maybe someday. especially my messy head. huh. if only those massage cud help to get rid all miseries in my brain out.. i dun mind spend my $$$ for it. seriously. but... sigh.

got home. cook for lunch. we were talking about masak lemak cili api tis 1,2 days. so, i cooked ayam masak lemak cili api *sempoi version* yesterday and tu dia... each of us, masing2 makan sampai 2 plates. agagagaga...

but, masak lemak cili api wasnt enuff. we continued with making kuih keria laksss after dat. wuoh. please dun get the wrong idea. BUKAN rajin occay. BUT stress kut. And dun feel like wanna read or doing essays or homeworks. Apalagi... project keria la pulak, sambil bagi kursus free pada rumet how to make keria. "Senang je kan rumet???" Mau nyer tak senang, sampai dia terlintas nak wat bisnes jual kuih lak. betul ke tu rumet?? agagagaga...

also invited some friends to eat keria together. Only Akmal was missing in action *action apakah?*. Nazrul, Aliyah, Sharifah.. and Mazlee was also joined us for Jamuan Keria. All the way dr Msia Hall tu. Tabik toing toing toing la Mazlee.

And now... m panicking. It's Wednesday!!! And the calendar turned to another forward piece in May. Another deadline to meet tis Saturday. Gosh!

Bila Eena membebel: Of all activities I had, still feel extremely SU*KS! Owhhh... sungguh takde mud! Downnyaaaa rasa!

Last nite...

2009-05-12T00:25:00.007+10:00

Just a brief note.

Got home after the JDD's lecture nearly 5pm. It was an interesting lecture. And the best part was... pakwe hensem duk seblah tu... siap tulis2 his full name, phone number n email address. kat buku dia. Macam saje je suh copy kan??? Ahakss... btw, nama dia Josh. Owhhh... Josh, I'm single and available occay. Agagagaga... tak boleh blah!

Actually, I feel extremely down today. Feel abit better after recite few pages of Quran after Maghrib *Yup. Quran tu kan segala penawar*... while waiting for my rumet to get home before going out together for a movie.

---

As what I've planned. I went out with frens for a movie - Ghosts of Girlfriends Past. Occayla. Enjoy the movie. I'd give 4 out 5 stars.

the trailer

and us... after the movies

---

Then we had dinner at Chilli Padi@Melbourne Central. First time being there. Not much choice and the taste pun... occay je *aku masak lagi besh kut???*

us...

what we had

Got home. And... wanna sleep. Dats all.

Bila Eena membebel: Sakit perut. Sakit kepala. Mo tido. Tamo bebel. Nite!

The evil inside conquers me... help!

2009-05-11T16:52:00.007+10:00

Monday is yet finished. A couple of hours left before we can tear out another piece of the calendar sheet and turn to Tuesday. Fuh. I cant seem to catch up with the extremely speedy time. Hardly catch my used-to-be organized schedule. And I cant hardly find my spirit, I mean a positive attitude towards all the difficulties am having in life.

Perhaps...

too much workloads.

exhausted.

not motivation.

But all these also seems to be merely an excuse.. reason... simply stopping myself to do something I knw for certain - I could do it!

But why...

physically I feel impaired?

mentally exhausted?

and,

spiritually lost?

*owh sempat je snap kaki sendiri on the fallen dried leaves, on my way to the lib td. Iklan kasut japs. hiks*

Am I actually listening to my very negative, evil side of myself?

Or where those upset feeling comes from if it is not from myself?

Where the positive side of me have gone? And simply make me feel this bad about myself...

I need you so much rite now. Like... soooo much! Seriously.

If only I cud beg you to come back and never leave me again.

Eena!!! Wake up... you can do it!

One month left *it is even lesser than dat after take out time to do some other routines* and many more to finish! Two 5000-words projects, one 5000-words Communication Report, and a dissertation to go.

Bila Eena membebel: Stress sgt dah ni. Cam nak kuarkan kepala otak, basuh jap, kasik clear... Erk, boleh ke gitu?

Brief summary of a not much interesting Sunday...

2009-05-10T23:29:00.005+10:00

nd rumet

Sunday. o830 - 1300

---Going for lecture (Queensberry St.'s building)

Sunday. 1300 - 1400

---Lunch with Nazrul and Aliyah (EsTeler, Cardigan St.)

Sunday. 1400 - 1700

---Lecture continued

Sunday. 1700 - 1800

---Home.

Sunday. 1800 - 2230

---Dinner with Su, Sharifah, Akmal and Mazlee (KFC @Flemington Rd.)

*pic kat kfc tidak perlu. dah byk kali kut post pic muka kitorang ni kat kfc tuh.. sila layan pics laen pulak.

Sunday. 2230

---Home (time to get some rest)

Woah... then tomorrow???

Lecture, meeting with Juliet (ngaaaaa! review.. takotnyaaa!!!), then, plan for movie in the evening. And .... cukup la kut!

Zassssssssssssssss....

Bila Eena membebel: Rumet, mekasih la souvenir dr Sydney. And thanks juga pada kawan kite yg bg souvenir dr Bright. Ada lagi, jangan lupa bagi lagi...

Such a tiring day...

2009-05-09T22:20:00.007+10:00

Woah... I am finally home! After spending a whole day in the lecture. Seriously exhausted.

Plus...

I wasn't sleep last nite.Was working on my thesis draft to submit to Juliet for a review. I finally made it! The whole nite! But to be frank, I wasn't satisfied enuff with my work. I know I could do better than dat. But due to the time constraint... sigh. NVM. At least, I have submitted it. And I will definitely work on it based on Juliet's recommendations and comments in our meeting this Monday. Looking forward for it. I am all ready for her criticisms and comments... I knw what I have done.

But... Monday? Meaning... I have to skip the JDD lecture. Haiyooo! Dunno yet. Mayb I'll attend the seminar after discussion with Juliet. Demi mu Juliet... tak kesah la. Agaggagaa...

---

On my way home after the lecture, sempat gak singgah apartment si Aliyah.

Obvious sgt kut kepenatan kat muka aku nih. Aliyah siap ckp, aku nampak stress and siap ada eyebag. Haaa la, dah tak tido nearly 24 hours. Adoyai.

Actually I went there to get My Kinder Bueno which I have asked her to buy for me few days ago. Yelah, ada sale kat Target. 1 pack Kinder Bueno baru 99cents. If not, it may cost you 2dollar++. But since I was soooo busy with lectures and stuffs, I asked her kind to buy me some *kebetulan jugekk dia pun memborong KinderBueno, kan*.

Yelah, its been quite awhile... I seriously craving for Kinder Bueno and Ice Lemon Tea.

Sila lihat stok KinderBueno tu. Ala, kejap jer tu.. Ice Lemon Tea tu pun dalam 2 ari je. Haih

Safeway lak still maintain the promotion, 3 bottles of 1.5l Ice Lemon tea for only 9dollars. If not, 1 botol kecik je dah 3 dollar.

'Gian' tak 'gian' lar... I can finish 1 botol of Ice Lemon Tea in a day! Cudnt remember how many times I went to Safeway dgn gigihnya, menghangkut berbotol2 Ice Lemon Tea. Terok betull!!!

Diet?

Forget it! It's cold now and soon will be winter. Which means....

It's time to enjoy foods... all the time!

Habis musnah sudah cita2 nak diet aku tuh. Buat2 lupa je lah ye. Agagagga

---

Well, a few days ago *tak ter-hengat lak hari apa*, I've received an invitation to present paper (based on my current research outcome) at the Indiana State University (ISU).

oah, ofcoz I feel very honoured and excited about it. Tis is such a great chance! Presenting paper kat US? Fuhhh... Surely I wont miss the opportunity. Plus, the date would be just nice... in October *and the deadline for registration/submission/payment will be on Sept*. Rite after m finishing my masters and spend some time in Msia *insyaAllah* for the Eid. The fee also quite reasonable for a student like me.

So....

ISU, here I come!!!

ISU = I Suka U, agagagagagaga!

*leh gak survey2 tempat utk wat Ph.D. Yeah, tentatively, I am aiming Canada. But if I have the opp to go to US, why not? Mana2 je la... org kata, blajar biar sampai ke negara China kan. Tapi tanak la ke China kut. Opsss!*

Sapa nak ikut??? Jom Jom Jom!

---

Hurmhhh... am alone again tonite. My rumet is currently enjoying her so-called 'unplanned trip' to Sydney since Friday. She had to go there for a MARA scholarship/loan interview. Punya la kelam-kabut dia coz everything was arranged in the last minute. Kesian budak tu. Hiks! BTW, gudlak la rumet *Owh...I mean for the result. Dah lepas dah pon interview dia*. InsyaAllah, if you're really meant for it, you'll get it. Then boleh la blanja Eena

Sempat gak la bikin kan dia Bubur Labu yang dia nak makan tu.. on the nite dia nk fly to Sydney. Hiks.

Paling besh, interview nyer cuma 10mins je kut... and the remaining time?? Apalagi, berjoli sakan la itu minah tu di Sydney nampaknya.. Huwaaaaa, nak itot!!! If not bcoz I have lectures during the weekend, surely aku pun dah slamat ikut sama. Dushh dushh!! #@#^%&%&^)

*tak boleh blah, 1 nite stay dah more than 60pics uploaded kat FB. amboi rumet....*

Tingat lak time aku interview for RLKA Scheme ni dulu. Was extemely-prepared. But the interview went just fine. 5 to 10 mins only... as far as I cud recall. And thank God, without the scholarship, I wont be here today. Dah nak habis master study dah pon.

---

Seriously, I feel damn exhausted this couple of days. Tomorrow will attend another 8-to-5 lecture.

Then... what's my plan?

Monday evening - go for a movie. Wanna watch tis movie "Ghosts of Girlfriends Past". I like both Matthew McConaughey and Jennifer Garner. Sapa nak ikot? Jom!

Also..

Hurmhhh... I was thinking of going for massage on Monday, but I just cudnt make it as I'm gonna have a meeting with Juliet and lecture in the afternoon.

So, on Tuesday - perhaps, will go for massage *rumet dah confirm nak gi sama* - bagi rileks sikit segala sendi and urat.

And also... I need to go to market to get some groceries! *lauk pauk dah habis ni. nak masak pun takde menda dah selain telur*.

Plan nak wat kuih keria.. dari aritu lagi. Perhaps on Tues also. Rumet nak blajar buat keria katanya. So, who wants to try my keria, jengah2 la if rajin.

Fuhhh... but for now, I think I need to get some sleep coz I need to wake myself up and be in the lecture hall by 9am tomorrow! Sigh...

Pen-off for now.